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Owen was accepted into Pre-K!

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Today was the day we were supposed to get word about Pre-K acceptance…and when we didn’t get any call, I just assumed we didn’t get it (which, honestly, was what we expected—and honestly, kinda hoped for so we could have more time to work on the poop thing).

Then the phone rang at 6:15 with the news that he got accepted!! Which means he now has to move back to his old classroom after just three days in the new classroom. But I’m not worried about that… What I am worried about, of course, is the whole pooping issue. It was one thing for him to be gone for just 3.5 hours—pooping could generally be done before or after. But being gone for 6.5 hours…?? There’s way more of a chance for…DISASTER. And I’m TERRIFIED that he’ll get kicked out and then he’ll be on a wait list to get back into preschool. 🙁

Interestingly, NC Pre-K requirements include a home visit…so that’s Thursday afternoon. Tomorrow will, of course, be spent cleaning up a bit. 😯

So, while I’m excited that Owen got accepted…there are two annoying things.

One? I GET TO MOVE KATIE’S NAP AGAIN!!! 👿 We had JUST gotten into the schedule of naps at 12:30 (to usually around 3)…and now I have to move them earlier because I have to pick Owen up at 2:30. So it’s possible we might have to go back to two shorter naps (one before pickup and one after). UGH. I’m hoping that she adjusts as easily as she did to the other schedule…

Two? I now have to drive an hour a day every day for drop-offs and pick-ups. (Accepting this placement means we’re off the wait list and cannot get placed if there’s an opening at the school five minutes from the house.)

That said, there are two minor bonuses: I no longer have to pay for school and Owen’s buddy was accepted into Pre-K as well.

It shall all be…interesting.

From the county website:

North Carolina Pre-Kindergarten (NC Pre-K) is a state-funded, community-based pre-kindergarten program designed to provide 4-year-old children, who may not otherwise be served, with a valuable educational experience for 6.5 hours per day. Children must be 4 years old on or before August 31, 2013 in order to be eligible, and must meet income qualifications.

Children with identified disabilities and children with other documented risk factors may also be eligible. All families, including military families, are encouraged to apply.

The NC Pre-K Program standards are built on the premise that in order to be academically successful in school, children need to be prepared in all five of the major domains of development outlined by the National Education Goals Panel. Each of these domains is critical to children’s well being, in particular for their success in reading and math as they come to school. The five domains are:

  • Health and physical development
  • Social and emotional development
  • Language development and communication
  • Cognition and general knowledge
  • Approaches to learning

NC Pre-K operates on the public school calendar. Children are required to have a health assessment, including dental and vision, upon enrollment. A developmental assessment is also provided to identify special needs and monitor growth in the program. Children also receive family support, and other community resources as needed.

What Does NC Pre-K Offer?

Some of the features of the program include:

  • A high quality early childhood learning environment for children with developmental, social, and familial risk factors that may affect their success in school.
  • High-quality childcare centers, with degreed teachers and state-approved curricula.
  • Small class sizes, with no more than 18 children, and two teachers in each classroom.
  • Family support regarding health, nutrition, developmental screening and placement for children with special needs.
  • Kindergarten Transition Coordination to support families and children as a child moves from pre-kindergarten to ensure a successful start in school.

The NC Pre-kindergarten program in Onslow County serves 859 children in community-based child care and public school settings in 53 classrooms.

I’m feeling disenchanted this morning.

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I am a bit disenchanted with Owen’s school this morning. I know it’s all a little last-minute and that’s fine, but it’s stupid little things like no coat hooks and bins, but just bins (which backpacks don’t really even fit in) and a boring outdoor play area (no playset area like he had before—just an open space and a volleyball net—really?). Not that that’s why they’re there or they need an awesome play area…it was just a bit disappointing.

But the biggest thing is that they have no room for Katie in the drop-in care. Why? Because oh, they don’t have drop-in care for 1-year-olds (which no one ever told me) but technically they could take her but because of all this room- and building-switching, they had to move kids and now the 1 year room is at capacity. I asked “So you really never offered actual drop-in care, it’s mostly for scheduled care?” Yep. Well, thanks for wasting my time and having me fill out all the paperwork for no reason. She said I could still call in the mornings and ask if there was a space, but the chances wouldn’t be good unless someone called in sick. Great. There are other locations around town but the point was to DROP THEM BOTH OFF AT THE SAME TIME AT THE SAME PLACE—not drop Owen off then drive 10 minutes across town to drop her off, only to reverse the process at 11:30.

I still have the other drop-in care, but they don’t open until 9am which means I’d have to waste an hour in town if I want to drop her off after Owen (or drive home 15 minutes, waste 30 minutes, then drive 15 minutes back to town). Annoying, first world problems…but stuff that makes my life more difficult.

Edited after pickup to add: Okay, I jumped to conclusions. The area outside their classroom is for the bigger kids. They do take them out front to the nice, cool, new play area. 🙂

Markers, Day 2

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Owen promised and PROMISED and PROMISED to use them correctly. So, an hour or so after he earned them back…they were ruined (he pressed the tips hard enough to disappear into the marker) PLUS he left them all uncapped and laying all over plus on the floor (which he was warned about yesterday). So I threw them all in the garbage.

Oh, and he had marker ON HIS LIPS and on his body. And there was marker on the toilet seat. Plus he had glue (from the “art set”) all over him! Ages 3+ my ass.

I may have lost my shit just a little.

I can tell I really need a break because normally I think things like that are funny or picture-worthy…and I’m not feeling that anymore. As a matter of fact, I feel like I’m failing…big time.

I’ll just say that Grannie and Papa’s visit cannot come soon enough.

Two weeks…

Two weeks…

Two weeks…

I’m having second thoughts about Special Needs Baseball

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Okay, so I’m REALLY having second thoughts about this Special Needs Baseball thing. It starts tomorrow.

Every one I’ve told about it is like “…Uh…why??? Owen isn’t special needs…” Which, well, technically he is (the autism diagnosis) but realistically, he’s probably not in regards to this baseball thing.

I still think it has the potential of being good for him—there are supposed to be three different levels of play (from needs LOTS of help to needs little help) and it’s good for him to be around other kids—but part of me thinks he may do just as well with “normal” baseball as this might just confuse him since there really are no rules and it’s all just for fun. And, if I’m being honest, part of me just doesn’t want to do it because I’m lazy and it’s a lot of prep work and energy to take two kids places. Of course, I also learned from the website that it’s religious-based, with “fellowship and food” after. Uh, thanks, but that’s not really my scene. So we’ll see about that.

Owen is somewhat excited—which is good—but he honestly doesn’t even really know what baseball is. He’s never watched it or played any version of it (I’m not even sure how he knows what it is—it must have been via osmosis or it’s just a boy thing). I’ve told him if we really don’t like it, we don’t have to do it (which is completely against my usual mantra of you wanted to do this, you’re going to do this)…but if he likes it, we can definitely go again.

It shall be interesting.

Pre-K phone call and thoughts…

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First, some background.

Preschool is what Owen is enrolled in now—generic preschool (that we pay for).

NC Pre-K is the North Carolina government-sponsored (free) pre-kindergarten—and is what he’s being considered for depending on what they decide about his poop issues. (This is the place I turned in the application late so at best we’re on a wait list.)

Preschool can be any ages up to and including 4—but generally at age 4 they go to Pre-K. I think Pre-K is more regimented—as they’re getting them ready for full-time school. Preschool is (as far as I can tell) glorified day care. (That’s not as bad as it sounds—they do have a curriculum so it’s not like the kids are running wild. But I think it’s closer to day care than kindergarten, if that makes sense.)

He doesn’t have to change any schools if I don’t want him to…but if I change him to Pre-K and he has issues, his original preschool spot might not be open (unless I continue paying for it—which seems crazy)…though I could get on their waitlist if there are no openings.

The plan is for Kindergarten next fall if all goes well as he’ll be almost 6. I just can’t see starting him and having him turn 7 in Kindergarten…especially since he’s already big for his age.

So, I just got a call from NC Pre-K to “ask me more about” Owen’s condition.

Yeah…I’m guessing they’re not going to even put him on a waiting list. Basically they have NO provisions (legally, etc.) to help clean up any accidents he may have or even to help with basic bathroom protocol. She said if he had any type of accident, he’d have to clean himself up, change his clothes, etc.

Which…wow. I can’t believe they expect a 4yo to do all that BY HIMSELF? I mean, I don’t think most 4yos could clean up a poop accident…but they get to go to preschool anyway. (Though I guess if there were too many accidents they’d get kicked out.)

I explained that he hasn’t had any major accidents since the hospitalization but if he did, he’s four and wouldn’t have the first clue how to clean himself up (well, he’d have a clue but it wouldn’t go well). I said he would be able to change his clothes but there’s no way he’d remotely be able to wipe himself but he does know how to wash his hands well.

It just felt like no matter what I said there was just no way to come back from “he doesn’t want to poop” and “he might have an accident” and “he has had issues pooping.”

So she’s talking to her supervisor and getting back with me to let me know if we’re placed, on a waitlist, or if it’s a complete no-go.

I asked where we’d likely be placed IF we were placed and she said Missy’s Private School or Shine 12 (next door to where he is now at Shine 14). She said they sometimes have a pre-k program at Shine 14 (where he is now) when they have funding…which they don’t right now. But Shine 12 and Shine 14 are right next door to each other (I actually just noticed today that what I thought was one big building is actually two buildings—so I googled and yes, it’s two Shine buildings.)

On the one hand, I like where he is (with two friends and moms I know and people that can pick him up if necessary) and the 3x a week is a hard adjustment as it is so I still can’t imagine going full-time 5x a week. (Both him handling it and me with the dropping off and picking up—though if it was full-time, it wouldn’t coincide with Katie’s naps at all.)

But on the other hand, he loves going to school and I imagine he would do okay in FT…plus Pre-K would be free and hopefully right down the street at Missy’s Private School (though of course I could get assigned the other one which would suck, but it’s at least the same drive I have now….just 5x a week vs. 3x a week).

So now I’m trying to think what I would do if offered which location… If I’m offered the close location, I think I’d be much more tempted to do it. If I’m offered the further location, I don’t think I would. Would it be better to stay on the waitlist for the location I want? If it’s available now, is it better to rip him away from his friends NOW or stay on the waitlist and rip him away at the half-way mark?

I didn’t consider any of this before because I didn’t know he’d have two friends in his class. I know kids are resilient, but I know he LOVES having his two friends in the same class…and it kills me to think I’d be taking him away from that. I’m leaning towards putting him in the Pre-K if he’s accepted…but the best case scenario would actually be to be put on the waitlist and magically have it come due about 2-4 months in so he’s used to the 3x a week schedule and can move up to the FT schedule.

But still. Ugh.

Owen’s going to preschool!

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Well, Owen is officially signed up for morning preschool three days a week! I wanted two, but she said better to start with more and cut a day (if necessary) than start with two and want to add a day and have there not be room.

Best part? One of his friends is in the same class! 🙂
Worst parts? Class starts at 8 and ends right in the middle of Katie’s nap. 🙁

So this means we’re all getting up by alarm (YUCK). This was a VERY rude surprise since we thought it was 8:30 (that’s what the paperwork I have said) and that was VERY doable with our regular schedule (Owen is up at 7, I’m usually up and showered by 7:30, but Katie can sleep until 8 or 8:30 sometimes—though it’s usually 7:30). But 8? Good god, that’s a BIG change in our schedule to be up and out the door by 7:35.

And on the other end, I either keep Katie up and deal with her being a hot mess and she falls asleep on the way to pick him up OR I let her nap but have to wake her up after 30-45m. Neither are appealing. Poor second kid gets the shaft nap-wise. The only thing I’m hoping is that maybe by getting her up earlier she will be tired earlier and will nap earlier… FINGERS CROSSED!

That said, one bonus to having a friend in the same class? I already know his mom well (she’s part of our mom’s group) and he’s an only child so she doesn’t have to deal with other kids napping…so she has GRACIOUSLY offered to pick up Owen on occasion and bring him home! So they’ll just come out for lunch and a play date! I swear, this mom’s group just keeps on giving and giving!

The only other thing I was planning on but didn’t pan out is dropping Katie off at the same place for once a week morning preschool…but they only do full-time care for one-year-olds (you have to be potty trained for pre-school classes). They do have drop-off first-come-first-serve daycare, though, so I may still be able to have a morning to myself now and again!

We got to meet his teacher, Miss Jennifer, and see his classroom. He had been SUPER excited about going to school and wanted to GO (not just visit) today but he didn’t seem too thrilled once we got in the classroom. I think (am hoping) it was because they just cleaned it (while the kids were outside) and it smelled like disinfectant. He also could see the playground and wanted to go play but that wasn’t an option.

After a few minutes he seemed a bit more at home and was walking around exploring. He had to go potty when he was there, so he got to check out the bathroom and wash his hands in the kid-sized sink (and learn how to use a different soap bottle and towel dispenser).

The teacher and I talked about his issues (mainly pooping and autism diagnoses) and she said she had another kid with GI issues and that she hadn’t noticed anything autism-related with him. She said they eat breakfast there, there’s no rest/nap time, water is available all day (they just have to ask for it), they have outdoor play time, and there’s no real regimented activity time (like “Okay, you HAVE TO sit here and practice writing for 15 minutes.”).

I still can’t believe this is happening. My baby is leaving the nest… I just wish he was taking a school bus so I didn’t have to spend an hour of my day trekking back and forth. 🙂

Happy 12th Anniversary!

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Happy 12th anniversary from halfway across the world, baby! It feels like just yesterday but also like we’ve been together our whole lives as I can’t imagine my life before you. I love you and miss you desperately!

Obligatory Flashback Wedding Photo

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And this year—after a respectable 11-year run—we FINALLY ended our accidental-turned-scheduled anniversary tradition of having Chinese for dinner. Damn marine corps not offering anything remotely Chinese in Afghanistan today. Hmph.

However.

We’re possibly starting a new tradition as Tom had steak and shrimp…so I figured instead of me just grabbing Chinese take out, I’d go and get steak and shrimp as well!

However.

I didn’t really want to get it take-out (who wants steak and shrimp to cool off on the 20-minute ride home?) but I honestly didn’t want to go by myself (well, with the kids)…so I sent an open invitation to my moms group…and one mom offered to come out with me (well, plus one of her kids). So…YAY for friends! And new traditions!

That said…WOW. I don’t think I’ll be taking the kids out by myself anytime soon. Or if I do, it will be to a FAST FOOD place or somewhere we can get much faster service.

Those of you with small kids will understand—you do everything QUICKLY. You order quickly (you quite possibly even order the kids meals first), you pay the check quickly, and you’re hopefully out of there before the squirming and whining begins. But unfortunately that was not how tonight played out. I fully blame the waitress, who constantly disappeared for loooong periods at every stage of the meal. Tom and I can usually get in and out in under 40 minutes. Ruth and I were there (at the same place) for just under ONE AND A HALF HOURS. Good god.

Ruth was a godsend, though. At one moment when it was a bit of a circus—everyone was noisy, there was too much crap on the tables and nowhere to put anything, Katie had reached for the knife three times in under a minute and was spilling corn all over the floor, Owen was asking for the third time where his milk was (damn slow waitress!), we were trying to share the onion appetizer…all while trying to place our food order—she volunteered to take the kids (my two and her one) for a brief walk so I could have a breather. And then she noticed Katie needed a diaper change so she did that, too.

/sigh

Of course, Owen didn’t follow along quickly enough and then Ruth was too far away for him to chase after so he stayed with me. Then announced he had to pee…so I had to take him back to the bathroom anyway. But then I left him with Ruth and went back to the table as they took a quick roundabout tour of the restaurant and I got to eat three bites of my salad in peace.

Overall it was a great meal—the steak and shrimp were REALLY good. It may have spoiled my usual order at that restaurant as well (I have ever only ordered one single thing every time we’ve gone there). The only thing that could have made it better? To have been able to calmly and slowly eat the yummy meal in peace and quiet—appreciating the food—instead of just shoving in a random bite here and there between managing two kids. Well, I guess that’s technically more than one thing. 🙂

I am so glad to have made a few new good mom friends who just UNDERSTAND and are willing to lend a hand—or supportive meal—when it’s needed.

And on that note… I mentioned that I’d probably order steak every time I went out because I wouldn’t be eating it at home because I don’t grill. And Ruth pipes up “I GRILL!” So I’ll provide the protein and the grill, she’ll provide the actual grilling, the kids can play in the pool…YAY!

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What’s in the box?

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If you know me at all, you know we order a lot of stuff from Amazon (and online in general, really—I mean, with two kids, it’s really the convenience factor). And with the quantity we order PLUS my sketchy swiss-cheesed mommy-brain memory, I often have NO idea what’s in each box when it arrives. Tom and I sometimes play a game: Can he open the box before I remember what’s in it? 🙂 (If you’re curious, I think it’s about 60/40 to him.)

Well, in my internet travels, I recently saw a really delicious recipe that I saved to Evernote post haste (Chocolate Chip Cookie Peanut Butter S’mores Bars by Cookies & Cups if you’re interested ) but what got me was the beginning text…which sounds just about like our household:

A few weeks ago I opened up my front door to a package.
Now I am no stranger to the package on the front door.
I consider myself a bit of an online shopping expert.

But sometimes when you are such an expert internet shopper you forget about the things you buy…

That is until the box ends up on the front step.

ORRR the husband intercepts said box, which is basically the worst day of my life.

In these cases he generally stands over me while I open the box, all while I over-explain about how it was “on sale”, a “total bargain” or (my favorite) “for the children”.

Anyway, when you open the box it’s like a surprise! What did I order? I can’t even remember!

It’s basically like Christmas.

I mean, you all know how much I LOVE CHRISTMAS… 🙂

But now, all I can think about is those yummy-looking S’more bars. Mmmmmm. I wonder how they’d travel to Afghanistan?!?

It’s the stupid little things.

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Tom leaving is always hard, and as the time draws nearer, it gets exponentially harder. But there are stupid little things that you don’t think about or don’t expect.

One of Owen’s random cartoons this morning (that we’ve never watched before) played Pachelbel’s Canon in D. SERIOUSLY?!? A song from our wedding? The day he leaves? Sure, THAT won’t set me off. 😐

Tom’s side of the bed cleaned up.

His side of the sink cleaned out.

His stuff not in the shower.

His shoes not on the rack.

The remnants of his last-minute packing on the kitchen table.

The random shirt hanging over the tub.

It’s seemingly never ending.

After a few days none of it will really bother me, but for now…it really sucks.

Owen’s first movie!

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The local autism society hosts “sensory friendly” movies at our theater—lowered volume, not completely dark, no ads or previews, you can get up and walk around, and you can bring your own snacks—which we thought would be a great first experience just in case…

As we were wandering around showing him the lobby, he immediately noticed the Planes sign and was very excited. 🙂

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Today’s showing was Despicable Me 2—and he was excited because he likes the minions.

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And…he loved the movie and did REALLY well. He didn’t talk that much and only got up once. He did ask for popcorn after his crackers were gone…so Tom bought the cheapest $7 bag…and Owen ate about six pieces. Which means we got to eat it (though I’m not complaining—it was delicious).

He did SUCH a good job that we stopped to get ice cream on the way home.

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And since he did such a great job, we’ll try to take him to one more regular movie before Tom leaves…

So, overall…the sensory-friendly movie experience was…interesting. For the most part it was okay but there were more than a few very young (read: too young) kids there who were running around. Now, this showing was meant for allowing that…which I understand. But really, if on a basic level your child is too young to sit still for even 15 minutes of a movie—and you’re constantly chasing them or herding them—I don’t think they should be there–even if it’s a more friendly version. There were also lots of crying babies/kids and noisy older kids…which I was okay with the older kids (this was an autism event after all) but the babies? Still no excuse…but I know some were there because the parents didn’t want to get a sitter. (The people next to us brought SIX kids—three of which were too young IMO.)

So while it was okay and Owen enjoyed it, I’m hoping he’ll do okay at a “real” movie…so we can hopefully avoid some of the other shenanigans.

Google maps has been overhead recently

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I was checking Google maps today to see how many in-ground pools were in our subdivision (for no real reason other than it’s a question that popped into my head while driving to Costco) when I realized that our satellite view has been (somewhat) recently updated.

I love how much I can determine from what we can see:

Previously, our view was fenceless. Now? The shed is there (so, after April 2012) but there’s a dead spot in the backyard grass where the pool was (so, after October 2012) but wait!—that’s not Tom’s car OR my car in the driveway!—whose is it? Aha! Dad and Linda’s minivan! And they were there in February 2013. And from the amount of stuff on the curb, it looks like garbage pickup day so it’s a Monday morning. And Tom’s at work (hence his car not being there) and since my car isn’t there I’m guessing I was running errands.

Looking back at my calendar, Katie had a 9:00 appointment for her flu booster on Monday, February 18…so that’s when Google got us.

Creepy or cool?

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The Deployment Talk

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So I had been DREADING this talk. We all know how much Owen loves his daddy and misses him when he’s just at work for the day…

We ordered the Sesame Street Deployment video (Elmo’s daddy goes away to help people, Elmo’s mommy stays home) and watched it ahead of time—and I couldn’t make it through without crying (but then, the last month is the most emotional for me).

So at breakfast, we finally told Owen about Tom leaving and Owen’s immediate response was “But I don’t want you to go. I will miss you.” Tom assured him that he would miss him, too. We told him it was like when daddy had to go to school before and was gone for a lot of days, but this time he was going farther away and wouldn’t be able to come home on the weekends. Owen told Tom that he would go to school, too. 🙂

Then we showed him the Sesame Street video…and he seems okay so far. It just seemed like any other Sesame Street episode to him. But now out of nowhere he’ll say “Elmo’s mommy stays home.” And I reassure him yes, Elmo’s mommy stays home—just like I will be here with him and Katie. I also repeat “Grown ups come back” (which is from Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood when Daniel Tiger doesn’t want his parents to go out for the night—the babysitter tells him that grown ups always come back).

I’m sure there will be worse times…but for now—when I’M still fragile—I’ll take his nonchalance.

The baby monitor is going back up today.

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As I walk into the living room this morning:

Tom: Look who just got up!
Me: Katie?
Tom: Yes, she slept in!
Me: Oh, you mean after crying for 20 minutes at 6:30?
Tom: I didn’t hear her over the fan.
Me: I did. I’ve been up since 6:30. FAIL.

The baby monitor goes back up today (it was down from vacation). I only have four more weekends of not having to get up with the early-rising kids…and I need every last one of them to be successful.

Straw sippy cups!

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This morning at breakfast I gave Katie a straw sippy cup to play/practice with. I marked where I filled it so I could tell if she actually drank anything or was just playing. And damned if she didn’t actually drink some! Then I let her have it during play time and she drank more! So…it looks like we’re going to bypass the hard spout cups. WOOHOO! (Owen didn’t drink out of straw cups until probably 1.5-2—but I don’t think we even gave him the chance because typically regular sippy cups come first so that’s what we did.)

At her second dinner (when Owen was finally eating at 8:00) I gave her the cup again and she was drinking and drinking. She’s still obviously getting used to the flow because she’d often choke a little bit on a big gulp of water. She’s also learning to hold it and pick it up…something she’s refused to do with her bottles thus far.

But look at how VERY proud of herself she is!

ALMOST BUT NOT QUITE!

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THERE YOU GO!

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TA DA!

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I’m really wondering if she’s going to be done with bottles sooner rather than later. She still drinks SOME but it’s really few and far between (I can’t tell you the last time she drank a full bottle in one sitting)—she’d much rather eat real food.

Impacted. Ugh.

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So…I haven’t been talking about it, but Owen is still having major poop(ing) issues. Everything from constipation to diarrhea. Lately we’ve been going through 5-7 pairs of underwear a day. 🙁

We’ve tried eliminating milk from his diet, he was tested for Celiac, we gave him probiotics…and nothing ever really seemed to help. So we scheduled an appointment with the GI specialist and it was this morning.

The diagnosis? He’s impacted. All the little peanut-buttery poops we’ve been getting is basically leakage because he has so much poop backed up that the soft stuff is all that will come out. (I’m sure it hasn’t been impacted the whole seven months…but it’s apparently been most of the time.)

So, we basically get to do colonoscopy prep without actually having the colonoscopy. A full dose of Miralax every hour from 8a–5pm and then a maintenance schedule of one full dose of Miralax every day PLUS Ex-Lax chocolates PLUS mineral oil PLUS as much of a high fiber diet as we can get him to eat PLUS sitting on the potty after each meal blowing up balloons (it mimics the action of pooping).

FOR SIX WEEKS. 😯

We basically have to retrain (and shrink) his colon while trying to teach him how to poop.

I can promise that tomorrow is NOT going to be fun for either of us. Nor is the following six weeks. But hopefully it will do some good… I’m hoping we’ll get back into undies fairly quickly.

So, then it was off to get him an X-ray and Tom met us there because of the whole no-kids-sitting-alone thing. Which Owen LOVED. 🙂

As far as him understanding what’s going on… He just knows he went to the doctor to see if we could fix his pooping. I explained what’s going to happen tomorrow (he has to drink lots of water and will be pooping a lot)…but who knows how much he really understands. 🙁

Photos from the day…

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What I did all day.

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It took me about five hours to bake four double layer cakes for Owen’s birthday cake.

Why so many?

Well, for starters, the theme was Legos, so I wanted to make a bunch of Lego blocks (squares and rectangles) and I knew one cake certainly wouldn’t be enough so planned on two from the start. Then as I was making the second cake, I realized I left out an egg…so called dad and Lin who were at the store and had them pick up two more, just in case the minus-one-egg cake didn’t turn out plus an extra in case I had a kitchen catastrophe. 🙂

I was exhausted by this time (about 5pm) but still had to make the frosting and get the first layer on. What a mess—and I was being careful!

Facebook post, 4:49pm: Someone slap me if I decide to make Owen’s birthday cake next year. I’m 5 hours in and not even close to done. And the *hard* part is next.

Unfortunately, it was a nightmare. I didn’t love the taste of the frosting (made with Crisco and powdered sugar) and it was an absolute mess to work with. And I can’t frost a cake to save my life— which I already kinda knew but thought I could certainly do some square cakes—so that didn’t help. And trying to frost the marshmallows (what was suggested for the Lego pieces) was the absolute worst. THE WORST. Betty Crocker can kiss my ass (though, to be fair, I didn’t use their pre-made frosting). But I still don’t think it would have helped.

Facebook post, 8:55p: WHY DO I EVEN TRY? Ugh. I can NOT frost a cake. These look nothing like Legos. And there’s no red. It’s dark pink. And I don’t think I like the Crisco frosting. Too much work and frustration. /cry

Yeah, I so didn’t get the true, vibrant Lego colors I had wanted—even with my special purchase of gel food dyes. (No, I don’t even have pictures of those monstrosities.) At that point, I was tempted to just toss everything in the trash and go buy a cake. Seriously. But then I was more logical and thought since I already had HOURS and MONEY and TIME invested, we’d eat these cakes.

And the kicker is that I know Owen won’t care at all so I really shouldn’t be putting myself through the stress of it…but I honestly thought making a Lego cake would be, well, a piece of cake.

LESSON LEARNED? From now on…I will never make a birthday cake for Katie or Owen again unless it’s a 9×13 in the pan or possibly a layer cake. Nothing fancy. No designs. No themes. Ever. EVER.

Sick kids suck.

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Why does no one warn you that sick kids refuse to take medicine, and if they finally do try taking it, they make themselves vomit?

Owen was an absolute CHAMP taking liquid Tylenol this morning. So when we tried after his nap? He took it, but refused to swallow it…just swishing it around in his mouth, with it slowly dripping out. I kept telling him he needed to swallow it and to NOT spit it out. So of course he started crying, which led to barfing…every single thing from breakfast six hours before—including whole chunks of bagel that he apparently didn’t chew.

Ugh.

I caught most of it in a blanket, but he still hit the couch and it was all over him.

So he had to take a bath AND take the medicine again. The second time he opted for the dissolvable candy-like pills (I always give him an option)—and he STILL looked like he wanted to vomit except he was completely empty.

Sick kids suck. (And I’m hoping the fever is directly related to the pink eye and he’s not actually sick because tomorrow we head to Chapel Hill for his genetics appointment and Friday Tom and I have an event to go to with friends).

I guess this is the payback I get for him never being sick when he was little.

It’s going to be a long day.

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My mom-hearing kept me on alert most of the night…Owen has been frequently getting up/whining in the middle of the night, and 2/3 of the time I end up going to his room to resettle him (Sunday night was 10:45, 12:15, and 4:00) so last night I was expecting it—especially with his yucky eye—so every little sound woke me up. Most of them were actually Tom snoring or his nose whistling, but mom hearing apparently can’t discern that too well from a half-asleep state, which then requires me to wake myself up more to REALLY listen. 😐 Then Tom’s alarm went off at 4:30 and I haven’t been able to fall back to sleep…

I think I’d be better off if I shut our door and just didn’t hear anything…except then I’d feel bad missing Owen if he was having issues. 🙁 (Oh, and his door stays open now because he DOES NOT want it closed. So I’m hearing more of his normal nighttime noises anyway…)

Today I was a zen master.

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Or maybe I should say a zenpoop master? Or a poopzen master? Whatever you want to call it, I was it.

I was calm.
I was cool.
I was collected.

I promised Owen I wouldn’t yell at him again.
I told him it was okay if he pooped in his underwear (but I’d still like him to try to poop in the potty).
I told him he wouldn’t be in trouble.

You see, in talking about this whole ordeal with my mom friends, I came to the conclusion that the Miralax might actually be making it harder (in a sense) for him to poop successfully—since if it was making the stool too soft, he might not realize he had to poop and then OOPS before you know it, it’s there. And if he really isn’t able to control it, then OHMYGOD do I feel guilty about getting mad at him, you know? As a friend pointed out, he’s still learning what it takes to poop—especially since it’s different than pooping in a diaper, we’re guessing he had constipation and possibly pain issues, and now with the drugs it’s a different feeling/experience yet! Ugh, talk about mom guilt. 😥

Hence the zen master.

Luckily it was a pretty easy day so I wasn’t REALLY tested…but we still went through (I think) five pair of underwear. But there were no HUGE disasters, which I think can be attributed to A) him pooping quite a bit over the past two days and B) decreasing the Miralax dose (I’m hoping to hit on the magic amount that will make pooping easier but not create a holy mess).

Please keep your fingers crossed.

Ugh. I lost my shit today.

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I do feel bad for yelling but OH MY GOD…he pooped a huge poop IN HIS UNDERWEAR and didn’t tell me. So when I discover it and pull his undies down (in front of the toilet), it falls out on the carpet AND HE STEPS IN IT. So now it’s ground into the rug and in between his toes—and he does NOT like to be dirty so he was having an absolute fit. (No, I don’t understand why—if he doesn’t like to be dirty—he tolerates a poopy butt.)

And then I see he has poop smeared all up and down his legs, not even mentioning the five wipes-full still in his butt. All the while Katie is screaming because she’s hungry and I can’t do anything because I have to take care of him. About 30 wipes later (baby for him and cleaning for the bathroom) it was off to the tub because I just couldn’t get it all off with wipes. And then I had to clean the carpet. And wash poop out if his underwear. Then clean the sink.

The only cute part was him saying “Me and Katie are crying. We’re not happy.” I told him mommy wasn’t happy, either. 🙁

I am SO over this. I know I wanted him potty trained, but at this point I really wouldn’t care if he’s in diapers until high school. This is THE biggest pain in the ass and I hate it. HATE IT.

Of course, after the heat of the moment, he was fine and I was fine…but of course I felt horrible (and I did apologize to him for yelling).

I know I’m not a bad mom—and I know I shouldn’t have acted as I did—but after you’ve been dealing with this for this long (going on a month) it gets really old. And frustrating. And sometimes you just lose your shit.

All you can do is hope tomorrow will be a better day.

Privileges lost

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Owen just lost all privileges of playing out of my sight.

He was upstairs and I assumed he was playing nicely. Ha.

Well, at first I heard some loud noises, but it sounded like his golf balls rolling around in the tub so I figured he was just playing in the tub which was fine. Then it got quiet and I got a little worried…but Katie was sleeping on me so I let him be and kept my fingers crossed.

Then he came down the stairs and I see he had taken off his pants and underwear—which worried me because that’s what he’s been doing when he has to poop. So I put Katie down (which wakes her up, of course) and go over to him…and notice poop hanging from his butt.

Ugh.

So I make him stand there until I can go grab a wipe to take care of that so it doesn’t end up in the carpet. Then we head up to the bathroom and OH MY.

Where to start? I couldn’t take it all in at once.

  • There was a pair of underwear in the toilet.
  • His underwear and pants were in a pile next to the toilet.
  • The tub was full of toys.
  • The hand towel was in the sink.
  • The mirror had water drops splashed on it.
  • The shelf above the sink was covered in water and toothpaste.
  • The countertop was covered in water and toothpaste.
  • There was poop smeared on the counter.
  • The toilet seat was covered in poop smears.
  • His shirt was drenched.
  • There was toothpaste on the countertop.
  • I lifted the towel from the sink to discover two toothbrushes—completely covered in a combination of toothpaste and liquid soap.
  • I noticed his kiddie flossers in the sink and on the counter—which meant he got up into the second shelf of the medicine cabinet (where I put things to keep them out of his reach).

UGH.

Needless to say he got a time out…and he lost TV privileges for the day.

Overall I know it could have been worse, but I was still livid. This is the kind of stuff I just do NOT have the patience for…and what I worried about long before having kids. And I have to say that if Owen was acting like this earlier (at a younger age, like the Terrible Twos that we missed) I would have seriously debated having a second.