Bah humbug.

So I got a free $10 coupon from JCPenney in the mail, and I thought I might as well use it since it’s free money, right?

So a few nights ago I went to try and find a photo album and long story short they didn’t have ANY where they said they would be, and I really didn’t feel like looking around more (with the 400 other people in the store), so I wandered through the kitchen stuff, sure that I could find something there to spend $10 on. Right away I found a covered 9×13 non-stick pan for $20, so it would be $10. AWESOME. I wait in line, get to the checkout, and am told the item is not eligible. Ugh. So I left it there and decided to check out baby clothes. Not that Owen needs anything, but if it was free…why not?

So I wandered around that section, thinking he could use bigger mittens…but I didn’t like any of the picked-over selection. It took some time to pick out what I wanted, but it was all on sale so it was a great deal (with the coupon, especially). After probably 20 minutes, I really didn’t want the stuff that bad to stand in line again (my fault, but still annoying) so I headed toward the exit, only to be stopped by a display of socks, thinking “Hey, I just mentioned the other day I could use [a certain type] of sock” but no, it’s men’s socks. But it’s right by the women’s lingerie section, so there should be socks there, right? Oh no. I wandered the entire women’s section there and NO SOCKS! So who the hell knows where they were, but I wasn’t about to spend any more godforsaken time there—so I left, vowing not to return because the stupid $10 was NOT worth the agony of shopping during the holiday season. (It was also a BIG reminder that I really am not a SHOPPER anymore. Online, yes. In person? No.)

So last night I had to go out to spend a free $10 Kohl’s coupon…so I figured what the hell, I might as well try JCP again. WHAT A MISTAKE. I go in, find something RIGHT AWAY that I could actually use. It was on sale for $9.99. Wait in line. Get annoyed by other shoppers. Go to check out and the coupon won’t work—the register says nothing valid was purchased. My clerk was about as slow as molasses. He looks a the coupon, looks at me, looks at the item in the bag, looks at me, looks at the coupon, looks at the register, looks at the coupon, looks at the register… Good god.

Then he says gee…
I’m…
not…
sure…
why…
it’s…
not…
working…

I said I didn’t know, either.

Then he slowly…
reaches…
into…
his…
pocket…
and…
pulls…
out…
his…
glasses…
case…
then…
opens…
it…
and…
takes…
out…
his…
glasses…
AND OH MY GOD I JUST WANTED TO SCREAM AT HIM TO HURRY THE HELL UP. Although I stayed calm and looked like the nicest customer ever. So after more painful slow waiting for him to react, he finally determined that there were already too many discounts on the item. I knew that wasn’t the case, so I logically guessed that the item was $9.99 and the coupon must state “$10 before taxes” so that was the problem. Then he agreed that was it. :roll: So I then nicely ask/joke if there isn’t some way he can just charge me $10 for the item (knowing full well that a cashier can generally change the price of an item—been there, done that) and he is, again, clueless. I am sure this guy was just temporary holiday help, because he really was AMAZINGLY CLUELESS. He asks the girl at the next register and of course the answer is no. Sigh.

So he just stands there and looks at me. Just looks. Doesn’t say anything. I’ve been a cashier. At this point, he really should have apologized, and/or asked if I would still like the item…anything but just standing there silent. So then I lost my cool a bit and took the initiative and told him I didn’t want the item, told him I’ve now tried to use this coupon twice WITHOUT SUCCESS and I’ve had it. I shoved the coupon back at him and told him to take it and give it to someone else because I was not trying again OR coming back. He STILL didn’t say anything and looked at me like he hadn’t even heard me—like he was still a few minutes back in the conversation. Ugh.

So then it was off to Kohl’s, where I had a perfectly lovely experience. Except that to get there, I had to deal with idiot drivers who refuse to pull out into traffic (on good roads, with plenty of time) or who refused to turn in front of a police car in a mall parking lot :roll: who then drove through said parking lot at about .5mph (of course, I was stuck behind him). Luckily, I found some great holiday things at Kohl’s and my coupon was accepted without hesitation—and I even got a smile or three during my AMAZINGLY QUICK checkout—plus a “Have a great holiday” as I was exiting.

Overall, I was reminded why I do 99.9% of my shopping online or before November 1.

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