So Tom had been having some lingering effects from his time with the stomach bug, so I finally convinced him go to the damn doctor. Well…
Long VA medical care story short, he ended up in the ER getting fluids because he was really dehydrated. They ran a bunch of tests and bloodwork but he just came home with anti-diarrheal and anti-cramping meds. Turns out his stomach was just still not happy and was creating problems.
I’m just gonna say this could have started to be resolved a week ago…but men.
Tonight was the first time the middle school jazz band has been in person since before the Covid lockdown! They performed at the high school with their jazz bands (well, not WITH, but at the same event).
To be honest I wasn’t sure what to expect—especially when the band director said they’d only had 14 practices together. But they were actually quite good!
Technically I really don’t belong anywhere in SeneGence—I don’t have any official uplines anymore (the CEO is mine, which sounds cool but doesn’t really do anything for me)…so that Jenna Clark has taken me under her wing in her group fills my heart (logistically I fall under her, but it’s so far below it’s not official).
So I have to admit I love seeing this when I visit her group. I am in the TOP 5 SELLERS of her entire global dominion (you can see her group has 6.2K members). If you would have told me this (almost) five years ago when I started this little side hustle, I would have laughed and laughed and laughed. AND LAUGHED. Yet here we are.
HERE I AM.
It has given me a sense of pride and accomplishment.
It has helped me get through some tough days.
It has helped us survive some lean times.
It has shown my kids that you can work for something and achieve it.
It has shown my husband I really meant it when I said I didn’t want a “real” job again.
Please don’t ever knock your friends’ side gigs because you NEVER know just what it means to them, their families, their mental well-being, or their overall life. Maybe consider celebrating them instead.
The turnaround time from Lap of Love was astounding. Maggie’s ashes were hand delivered to us this morning. Katie put her with the other pets (and the sign she made).
Cue tears. (And more random tears when I’m writing and posting this on 3/6.)
Katie was emptying the dishwasher and putting away pet spoons and bowls. We discussed what to do with them. (We are keeping some pet stuff JUST IN CASE but also getting rid of some things.)
I was fine.
She asked about some of Maggie’s toys. I said we still had to sort through them but would likely give most away.
I was fine.
She asked about the collars. I said we’d probably get rid of them. And then she handed them to me.
We had Anna and Dave and kids over for dinner to help our house not feel so empty and quiet and to try and take our minds off things. And it helped for sure.
But when it was bedtime, and the activity of the day calmed down and their minds were free to wander, all the emotions came screaming back to the surface.
Poor Katie was sobbing and wanted to sleep with us. I felt a little cold (and guilty) saying no, but honestly I desperately needed my own sleep and wouldn’t have been able to at all with her in the bed. So we let her cuddle for a bit and then sleep on the floor next to us which she was happy with.
I did take Tylenol PM so I’d hopefully get a decent night’s sleep…and I know it will get easier…but for now it seems impossible she’s really gone.
So here’s how my makeup lasted today. I think it’s pretty damn good considering I was legit bawling my eyes out for a good solid two hours plus crying on and off the rest of the day. The mascara does seem to have disappeared a bit, but it’s not all over my face! I didn’t even look at my face once all day to check it.
Soooo I give the waterproof mascara a definite passing grade!
Yes, round 2. Thankfully our new insurance covers braces again so we’re only out another $2500 (this round is about $3k more than the last one but the coverage is better).
I did ask if he wanted to reschedule (since we obviously had no idea two months ago what we’d be doing this morning) and he said no.
I wasn’t going to take any pictures but then during the process Owen asked if I would…so of course I did!
We’re never ready. And it is unbelievable. The day we bring them home the first time… THIS day feels forever away. Until one day, it’s a day away. It seems impossible. —from my dear friend Kelly
Cuddling with the boys…
I’m so glad we opted to do this at home with Lap of Love Veterinary Hospice. Maggie deserved to be in her own home surrounded by her favorite people being showered with all our love and kisses. It was the kids’ first in-person experience with pet death and it was so very hard but, we thought, necessary.
The vet, Dr. Kylie, was amazing. She was loving and gentle and patient and kind. She gave us privacy to say our goodbyes and made a paw print for us.
Goodbye, sweet girl. We love you more than you could ever know.
We wrapped her and sent her off in one of her blankets.
Tom chose to carry her to the vet’s car.
And then we all cried some more and tried to parse that Maggie was really gone…the house just seemed so quiet and empty.
It’s honestly a blur (writing this 9 days after the fact). I don’t remember what we all did. But I do know that Owen had to get ready to get braces later in the day — I had asked if he wanted to reschedule and he said no.
And Tom saying a final goodnight to his girl. I cannot look at these pics without crying.
Katie and I decided to sleep downstairs so we could be with Maggie and take care of her. I didn’t want her to try and jump off our bed during the night and I knew I’d have to help her go outside.
We were up every hour because she wanted to drink. Every other hour she needed/wanted to go outside so I walked her down the steps.
This is where she slept — on me — most of the night. Completely unusual. It’s like she knew something was different.
We see Anna and David and the kids a lot. But tonight was the night they all came over to say their goodbyes. They all love Maggie as much as we do. She got soooo many pets and scritches…and Anna finally got the calm Maggie cuddle she’s always wanted.
Today we had to make the hardest decision a pet owner has to make. And now the hardest part is waiting until it’s actually time.
Hug your pets and give them a scritch for us.
Maggie seemed normal first this morning and then BAM—she could no longer stand or walk—and didn’t even want a treat.
Tom and I called probably six at-home euthanasia vets and apparently pets just aren’t supposed to die on Sundays because nothing is open or available—so it’s tomorrow morning. (Emergency clinics are open but we don’t want to take her somewhere new and strange.) But it will be at home and all four of us will be here because it’s a holiday so there’s no work or school.
Owen comforting Katie.
Of course as the day progresses we’re second-guessing the decision because she seems a little better…but the old girl is 16—already 4+ years past the typical life span of a Boston Terrier—or 80 in human years. She’s been having a lot of old age issues for about a year now, so we want to do this before something extreme and/or potentially painful happens.
I know she loves sitting in the sun so I took her outside for a bit—wrapped up, of course, because even though it’s 47° today it’s super windy. Her little nose was happily sniffing the whole time.
I’m exhausted from crying but making memories sitting and cuddling with her all day. So until further notice I’m a sobbing human pillow for my old girl.
She woke me up at 4am to say she puked in the bathroom sink. But at least she made it to the sink instead of in her bed! Small favors! (Well, except I had to clean vomit out of the sink. And it smelled eerily similar to Owen’s vile mess.)
She crashed on the couch because she says her bed is uncomfortable. I know she just wants to be by me so she can talk to someone when she wants. This morning it was 100 questions: How did you clean the sink? What time is dad going to be home? Why can’t I eat regular food? How many times did Owen throw up? What if I can’t eat or drink all day? What happens? Who was that text from? Can I drink some water? What’s Maggie doing?
OMGGGGGGG PLEASE GO TO SLEEP AND REST!! Compared to Owen who slept silently in his room all day.
Maggie wanted to be with her. I know, awwwwww.
But wow oh wow was she moany and whimpery all day. It was very disconcerting. I’m guessing she’s just not familiar with any kind of pain so it’s all overwhelming. I mean, she sounds about like how I felt when in the throws of my gall bladder issue but I know that’s not her issue.
Aaaand in a complete 180 from how the middle school handled things…apparently Katie needs a Covid test TODAY according to health department guidelines. What? Why would it be different than MS? The nurse had no idea, it shouldn’t be. Katie wouldn’t even be allowed back in the building to even do a test on Tuesday (no school Monday) because they don’t know if she’s negative or positive. And it has to be a lab-based negative test to come back. GRRR. I know this is protocol but shit like this makes me want to have lied and tell them Katie is taking a mental health day. She has a stomach bug like we all did. It’s not Covid. So then I had to figure out where to get her tested—and not wanting to take her today because she’s really sick.
And that was even a process (of course) because I tried to register for testing at the local community college and it said my number was already in use so I tried for like 10 minutes to reset my password with no luck. I called and they were really nice and helpful and got me set up. Turns out my number was already tied to both kids for their school shield testing.
And then I had to call the assistant superintendent’s office to try and get clarification on why buildings handle things differently and leave feedback on the whole process. But of course had to leave a message.
So Katie is whimpering away, tossing and turning, her back hurts (but she refuses to lay flat and stays crunched up in a ball), she’s afraid to drink because she doesn’t want to throw up, nothing sounds good to her. So I tell Tom it’s his turn to come sit with her (he had a half day today so he was home resting because he’s still not at 100%) and he comes downstairs and she immediately asks him if she can watch a movie and get a drink of water and I’m thinking what the hell girl like two minutes ago and for the past two hours you’ve been a mess the whole time but dad walks in and now you’re normal? Of course.
And then this happened. We actually had to move her so she didn’t fall off.
Nothing like being woken at 3:30am by a sick kid (“Mom…Mom…I threw up in my bed”) and having to change the sheets twice in 20 minutes. (Which was especially difficult because a teen boy does not take care of his laundry or keep sheet sets together. So he might or might not have one sheet and a dog blanket on his bed.) And try not to get sick myself because that smell was the most vile thing I’ve smelled in my life. (It was half a day before the smell finally left my nose.)
The first load of laundry went in at 4am with more loads to come (sheets, comforter, mattress pad—oh yeah, we learned that his mattress pad wasn’t really waterproof so his mattress got a quick spot cleaning).
I’ve forgotten how awful this is — no one has been sick like this in years.
Thankfully he slept most of the day. Even took a shower and went back to bed.
I had been worried about having to get him tested for Covid — even though we knew it was a stomach bug, everything is a symptom of Covid so it’s mandatory — but the nurse said she knew the stomach bug was going around, so as long as he followed the normal return-to-school-after-sickness protocol (minimum 24 hours with no vomit or diarrhea) then he could come in to the nurse’s office before school and get tested. Excellent!
He was doing pretty well by that night (he was able to eat a little bit) but still tired. And I started to feel a little off so we all went to bed early (plus I was exhausted since I had been up since 3:30am and only had a short nap).
Today was the day, y’all! I delivered all 50 Blessing Bags to A Safe Place/Lake County Crisis Center! They were thrilled and couldn’t wait to hand them out! I told them I will probably do something similar every year so stay tuned…
We love our local Hawaiian food truck so much that we splurged and got their SuperBowl Platter (meant for 6-8 people) even though we are just 4 people. (Oh darn, we’ll have leftovers.)
So tonight was hush puppies with remoulade, coconut shrimp with orange mustard marmalade, poke nachos, mochiko chicken, and Asian slaw and spam musabi (not pictured). It was all DIVINE.
And if that wasn’t enough, Anna had decided to make Doubles, a traditional Trinidadian sandwich that David hadn’t had in years. (It’s curried chickpeas and cucumber chutney on fried bread.) Those were yummy, too!
And then it was off to the couch to finish watching the big game (or, rather, the commercials). The dogs enjoyed it, too.
It was a school night so we headed home early, totally stuffed but already looking forward to Hawaiian leftovers!
I never nap. Like legit almost never. But this morning was one of those rare times. So what happens?
Let’s just say this is the look of someone who had probably only been asleep for five %#@$ minutes when an unnamed 9yo decided to wake me up to ask where her dad was. Because obviously I’d know since I WAS SLEEPING.
I told her I didn’t know. And guess where he was? About 10’ away in the kitchen. AYFKM?
I love me some skincare. So every few months (okay who are we kidding, it’s usually 4-6 months) I try to schedule some self care. (I also usually try to buy salon gift cards when they’re on sale!)
Today was a Hydrafacial + chemical peel + brightening treatment + relaxing music + a warm blanket for an hour and I swear I almost fell asleep. And now my face feels amazing and I’m glowing.
When was the last time you did something JUST for YOU?
Please tell me mine aren’t the only ones that do this? Come home, kick off shoes, and leave door open? I did give Owen major props for bringing in the packages but c’mon boy — it’s winter. Close the damn door! (Katie does this, too. Today was just Owen!)
