A Whirlwind Week

We were going crazy thinking about stuff we never drempt we’d be thinking of. I actually think we were on autopilot for a few days. Of course I, being the organizer, immediately created a hanging folder for all the information and paperwork we had…plus I started a notebook for any questions we had and thoughts that occurred. I didn’t want to forget or overlook anything.

Of course, every 10 minutes we alternated between “WE’RE BUYING A HOUSE!” to “Something has got to go wrong. We won’t get this house. It was too easy.” After all, we hadn’t bought the house yet. In our excitement over the whole thing (and our total cluelessness as to the actual house-buying-process), we actually thought we had already bought the house! Silly, silly us—we had just signed a contract for the offer to purchase the house! (Oh, the things you learn after the fact!) We did still have to gather lots of paperwork for the mortgage company, but our agent assured us he didn’t anticipate any problems with us getting the loan.

Just to calm our nerves a little—and to hopefully prepare for future decisions—we spent some time at Home Depot looking at carpet and linoleum so we’d hopefully get an idea of what we liked before we had to make any decisions. We’d rather spend unhurried time here looking at everything and hashing it out—than end up having to spend three hours with the contractor arguing over minutiae. As it turned out, it’s a good thing we did this, because our real estate agent called us mid-week to tell us it was time to pick out our carpet—the contractor was moving along quite rapidly and he was ready! This really caught us off-guard because we assumed we’d have a few weeks, or maybe we could even stop by Lowes to pick out stuff (if that’s the vendor the contractor used). But nope—less than a week after we were in NC the first time, schedules were rearranged and we were headed back down! Unfortunately, I couldn’t take off the whole weekend, so we didn’t get to leave until Friday around 4 and I had to be back to work Sunday at 10.

Our first visit.

After some research and contact with a real estate agent, we decided to finally bite the bullet and head to Jacksonville, North Carolina (Camp Lejeune), for the weekend to see the area and start looking for a place to rent. It really was too early to look at rentals (since everything we looked at would surely be gone by the time we were ready to plunk down a deposit) but we went with our real estate agent anyway just to get a feel for what was in store for us.

Unfortunately, there wasn’t much…having pets really cuts down on the number of available options. So, what there was we either didn’t like (the first house we saw was absolutely gorgeous on the outside with a cute little driveway and front yard…but the inside was very old and in need of TOO much work—plus it was $850/month) or the ones that we really liked were just too expensive (the last house we looked inside was perfect—just the right size, great amenities, and much much newer [what we’re used to]—but it was $925/month—somewhat outside our budget).

Sidenote: For those of you who know what we pay now for our dinky apartment ($900), you may be asking “What’s the big deal about paying that much for a house?” Well…it’s a matter of how much Tom is allotted for housing. Since Quantico has a higher cost of living (pretty much the highest in the country), we get just over $900/month for housing. Camp Lejeune, however, has a much lower cost of living, and we’ll only get about $700—so anything above that comes straight out of our pockets. And while we could afford a BIT above that, we certainly couldn’t afford $200 or so above that.

We looked at many neighborhoods, and we didn’t like any of them. Most were very crowded (think cars parked on the road and houses an arm’s length apart) and were older buildings besides. The townhouses were nice—somewhat crowded but acceptable—but none had garages (something we really wanted for storage purposes, which is why we wanted to rent a house in the first place). So, since we weren’t finding any acceptable rentals, our realtor (of course) suggested buying a new house. After we got done laughing at him, we explained that we’d love to, but that we didn’t really think our finances were in good enough order to do so. He said “Let’s just go look at some new houses. You’d be surprised at what the rent would be…considerably less than what you’re looking at for rentals.” So off we went.

About eight miles out of town, we reached River Hills, a brand new subdivision (where, ironically, we saw neither a river nor a hill). And we looked at two new houses, neither of which was even finished being built (but one of which was the reverse twin of the house we loved earlier but which was too expensive). Of course, we loved both, but didn’t want to get excited about them…I mean, really. Us buying a house? What planet did we think we were living on? As we stood there falling in love, the agent whipped out his trusty calculator and figured our payments would be about $700 a month. What? That certainly got our attention!! On the way back to the office, we again explained our concerns with getting a loan, and he said “We’ll just have you call our mortgage agents and see what happens. We’ll go from there.” So we did. And to our surprise, we were pre-approved for a VA Loan!! So we decided to go ahead and buy a house! We quickly debated which one of the two we wanted and he started the offer-to-purchase paperwork! We came back a few hours later and signed!

It’s a three-bedroom, two-bath house with a two-car garage, fireplace, and a huge screened-in porch. Since the house isn’t finished, we will get to pick the carpet, flooring, countertops, and cupboards. It comes with some appliances, but we have to buy our own refrigerator and washer/dryer…along with some other things we hadn’t though of like a mailbox and garage door opener!

So, after we finished the paperwork, the rest of the night was spent saying “OH MY GOD. WE BOUGHT A HOUSE” about every 10 minutes. We are so very excited, yet scared to death. The whole process was just so sudden (we were NOT planning on buying and by the end of the day, we had bought a house!) and easy (I had always imagined the house-buying process to be looooong and very tedious).

After we had dinner out with friends, we decided it was time to call the parents! Tom called Marsha first and of course, she was thrilled for us. Ironically, she told us, she had recently bought a landscaping book for us, in the event we EVER bought a house. Then I called my dad and Linda—and the first words out of his mouth were “Without asking me?” Gotta love dad. Of course, they were also thrilled for us, and wanted to know every last detail (and you know dad is just itching to get here to make sure the contractor is doing everything correctly)! Then I called mom and David and after the initial shock wore off, they were thrilled for us, too!

We’re both excited to actually have space, space, and more space. For once, we’ll actually have too LITTLE furniture!! We’ll also have a dedicated computer room and a dedicated guest room (you won’t get a real bed, but you’ll get a blow up bed in your own room)! Tom is excited because he’ll get to have a workshop in the garage (which means he’ll have to park in the driveway, which he accepts!). I’m excited because I actually get to decorate—I’m already picking out paint colors in my head (master bedroom, light sage; main bath, golden yellow). We don’t relish the thought of having to spend a few grand on appliances, etc., but it’s a necessary evil. I also don’t really like having the washer/dryer in the garage, but we liked that house better overall (the floor plan felt more open and therefore bigger) plus we really liked the screen porch (or “The Fuzzy Run” as we’ve taken to calling it—he’ll probably get his own kitty door).

Closing is officially May 30, and we’ll be moving in shortly after Tom graduates on June 13!! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?? WE STILL CAN’T!!!!

Northern Michigan Wedding & Event 2003 Magazine

Out of the blue (in March 2003), I received a package from my photographer. Intrigued, I eagerly opened it…she had sent me two copies of the Northern Michigan Wedding & Event 2003 Magazine, with a sticky note telling me which pages we appeared on! Our pictures really have nothing to do with the particular articles they appear beside–and they used the same picture twice–but our pictures are there nonetheless! Yea! We’re published! We’re going to be famous!!

 

Magazine Cover

Magazine Index with Picture

Magazine Story with Picture

I called the publisher to try to get some extra copies for everyone, but they were really no help. But, a friend came through for me…Annie searched out stores in Traverse City and got me enough copies to give to all the girls!

Our Sweetie: RIP

Although we only knew her a short time, we loved her dearly.

Rainbow Bridge
AUTHOR UNKNOWN

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge. When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water, and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing: they each miss someone very special to them who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; his eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face, your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart. Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together….

Lt. & Mrs. Thomas & Jennifer Hudson

You can find all of the wedding pictures at Shutterfly — why duplicate the effort here?

The short story…

THOMAS AND JENNIFER TIED THE KNOT on an absolutely gorgeous Saturday morning in the Northern Michigan town where they met. The ceremony went off without a hitch (okay, maybe one—but you’ll have to read further to see what it was) and everyone loved the couple’s personalized vows. Then the couple and their guests enjoyed a three-hour gourmet lunch reception aboard the local Grand Traverse Dinner Train. The couple left the reception on a horse-drawn carriage.

The long story…

SMITH/HUDSON WEDDING CEREMONY
August 18, 2001
Grand Traverse Children’s Gardens
Traverse City, Michigan
10:30am

Pre-Ceremony

The girls arrived at the library at 10:15…in plenty of time for the wedding (10:30!), but much later than anticipated. (We originally planned to get dressed at the library, but it just didn’t happen.) I had also totally forgotten that we had lots of wedding stuff in the van that had really needed to be at the site earlier (the CD player and prelude music, the guest-signing picture frame/matte, and the programs) so that stressed me out even more, although I do have to give my attendants (and brother!) credit for getting things taken care of. A stream of people came in to see me, and while it was nice, my mind was elsewhere—I was still very nervous and hoping that everything went okay. I was elated to see that after all my worrying and back-and-forth with the florist, my flowers were absolutely gorgeous (sidenote: they were MUCH heavier than I anticipated). Then before I knew it, it was time! (I also learned that the guys had arrived at the library much earlier, and were actually starting to get worried because we weren’t there yet!)

Ceremony

I had to wait with my dad around the corner while the mothers were seated, because Tom was doing it and he couldn’t take the chance of seeing me. My dad started to say something that sounded sentimental and I bluntly told him to be quiet. Then he started again and I “shhh”ed him again. This went on for a good minute. I kept telling him he couldn’t say anything that would make me cry since that would ruin my makeup and give me red eyes!! He ended up getting out one sentence which wasn’t TOO bad! Then we got our cue, so as we walked toward the garden, I looked over and saw Tom standing there in his uniform. WOW!!!!! He looked absolutely amazing! So we stopped at the back of the garden and waited for the trumpeter to start. It was VERY surreal looking around and seeing everyone who was there, all looking at me—and Tom waiting for me! Then the trumpeter started and we walked up the aisle.

I alternated between looking at all the guests, looking up at Tom, and looking at the ground (for dips and bumps) to make sure I didn’t trip and fall. The aisle wasn’t very long, so that part was over quickly. Tom came down to us, my dad handed me off to Tom and shook his hand, then I gave him a kiss and Tom and I walked up to our places. Julie welcomed everyone and started the ceremony. This was the weirdest part, because we were both just standing there looking at everyone. I wanted to at least hold hands (wondering if brides and grooms normally did that—I couldn’t remember!) but I had my bouquet and he was being Mr. Strict Military Man (as he was technically supposed to be) with his arms at his sides, his hands in little fists. This part seemed to go on FOREVER. However, it was neat to have time to be able to see everyone who was there!

WEDDING PROGRAM

Clicking any of the four wedding program thumbnails below will popup a full-size version.

PRELUDE

Various Classical Selections

PROCESSIONAL

Variations on a Theme by Paganini (Rachmaninoff)

Seating of the mothers (Grandma, Marsha, Linda, Jean) by Tom

That’s How You Know It’s Love (Deana Carter)

Groom’s Attendants (Kate, Don, Morgan)

Best Man (Rob)

Groom (Tom)

Bride’s Attendants (Marie, Kathryn, Beth)

Maid of Honor (Angi)

Flower Girl (Jessica)

Trumpet Voluntary (Clarke)

Bride & Father (Jen and Mike)

THE PRESENTATION OF THE BRIDE

Who presents this bride for marriage? Her parents. (Dad hands Jen off to Tom. Tom shakes Dad’s hand. Jen kisses Dad on cheek. Jen and Tom walk together to front and face the guests.)

WELCOMING OF THE GUESTS

Good morning. I’m Reverend Julie Chai and I have the honor of officiating this marriage ceremony which Jennifer, Tom, and I have co-created. On behalf of Tom and Jennifer, I would like to welcome all of you to this ceremony celebrating the love they have for each other. We would also like to welcome those who have passed on and are celebrating with us in spirit today—especially Tom’s father, Robert.

We would like to take this opportunity to introduce you to the parents of the couple. Would the parents please stand? On your left is Tom’s mother, Marsha, and Jennifer’s mother Jean and stepfather David. On your right, her father Michael and stepmother Linda.

QUESTIONS TO THE PARENTS

As the parents of Thomas and Jennifer, do you affirm your continuing support and love to them as they grow in their marriage? Yes.

Do you celebrate with them in their decision to choose each other? Yes.

Do you offer them the best of your care and counsel in times of struggle, and will you celebrate with them in times of joy? Yes.

THE ROLE OF THE COMMUNITY

As the much loved friends and family of the couple, you are very important to them and your role in their marriage is a very important one as well. Today you will be witnesses to the vows they will be making uniting them as a couple. As witnesses, they ask that during times of stress, you offer them a quiet listening ear, advice when requested, and encouragement to uphold their vows, honoring the love they have found in each other. It is our hope that as we celebrate the love of Jennifer and Tom here today, that you will also cherish and hold more dear your own loving relationships. And as they take their vows, that you, too, will find renewed commitment in the relationships you have made in the sacredness of your own lives.

ABOUT THE COUPLE

I asked Tom and Jennifer why they want to get married and what is drawing them to each other. Tom noted that he was first attracted to Jennifer’s eyes and smile. He said, “I love her personality and sense of humor. We are so much alike that it’s comforting. She’s easy to be around.” To this Jennifer quickly added, “It feels like we’ve been together forever.” Tom agreed, noting that they often know what each other is thinking and he said, “Jennifer is my best friend and I couldn’t think of being with anyone else.”

Jennifer remembered the first time they met, saying, “When we saw each other across the smoky bar and met [big laugh from the guests!], we knew that night we would get married.” She said that she loves the fact that Tom loves her unconditionally, no matter what. And she appreciates how easygoing Tom is and how he gets along with everyone in her family. Finally, she noted, “Tom does his best to make me happy, including the cute little animal noises I love.” [Everyone laughed. Then, still laughing, Julie asked if anyone had ever heard these noises—because she kept hearing about them but had never actually heard them. Everyone laughed again.]

WORDS OF SPIRITUAL SIGNIFICANCE

And now Jennifer’s Aunt Marge will offer some thoughts on love:

Love is caring as much about the welfare and happiness of your spouse as about your own. It makes burdens lighter because you divide them and joys more intense because you share them. Love is a promise that is always kept, a fortune that can never be spent, and love is a seed that can flourish even in the most unlikely places.

And now Jennifer’s brother-in-law, Jim Coe, will read an excerpt from The Art of Marriage:

A good marriage must be created. Remember that it is the little things that are the big things. It is never being too old to hold hands…remembering to say I love you at least once a day…never going to bed angry…and at no time taking the other for granted. In a good marriage you have a mutual sense of values and common objectives. And you stand together facing the world. In a good marriage you do things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy. You speak words of gratitude and demonstrate it in thoughtful ways. In a good marriage, the husband is not expected to wear a halo, or the wife the wings of an angel. You do not look for perfection in the other, but cultivate flexibility, patience, understanding, and a sense of humor. You forgive and forget. A good marriage is not only about marrying the right partner, but being the right partner.

SYMBOL OF UNITY

As a symbol of their unity, Jennifer and Tom have chosen a bell. During times of conflict and pain they will ring this bell. In ringing the bell, they will be reminded of the love that unites them and surrounds them here today. The ringing of the bell by the couple.

THE HANDS OF THE BRIDE AND GROOM

[Note: At this point, we finally get to turn towards each other.]

Jennifer, hold Tom’s hands, palm up.

Jennifer, these are the hands of your best friend—young, strong, and vibrant as he promises to love you all the days of his life.

These hands will work alongside yours as you build your future together, laugh and cry, and share your innermost secrets and dreams.

Though large and strong, these are the hands that will be so gentle as he holds your baby for the first time.

These are the hands that will work long hours for you and your new family.

And these hands will love and cherish you throughout the years in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy.

Jennifer, bless these hands you hold before you this day.

Thomas, hold Jennifer’s hands, palm up.

Tom, these are the hands of your best friend—smooth, young, and carefree as she promises to love you all the days of her life.

These are the hands that will hold you tight as you struggle through difficult times.

These hands will hold you with joy and excitement and hope each time she tells you that you are to have another child, that together you have created a new life.

These hands will console and comfort you.

And these hands will love and cherish you throughout the years in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy.

Tom, bless these hands you hold before you this day.

Please join in the unison prayer for the blessing of the vows by repeating after me:

Jennifer and Tom, we your friends and family celebrate your love and with our love bless the vows you are about to make. Receive the patience, courage, wisdom, and humor you need to grow together, and fulfilling your vows now and forever.

THE VOWS OF THE COUPLE AND EXCHANGE OF RINGS

Jennifer’s vows:

Thomas, I love you.

  • I promise to affirm my love for you by giving you a quick wink and a smile to let you know everything is okay.
  • I promise to hold you and comfort you to make you feel safe.
  • I promise to try to appreciate the good in everything.
  • I promise I will give you time to work things out when you feel overwhelmed.
  • I promise to do my best to accept the time it takes you to analyze and make a purchase.
  • I promise to accept your quirkiness and unique sense of humor.
  • I’ll do my best to understand your need to have the TV on all the time.
  • I promise to do my best to understand and accept your future military responsibilities and not make you feel guilty about having to put studying first.
  • I’ll do my best to try not to watch QVC as much.
  • I promise to never put another sugarprincess sticker on my car, just in case you ever have to drive it.
  • I look forward to making our relationship even stronger and spending the rest of my life with you.
  • Thomas, I give you this ring as a symbol of our vows—and with all that I am, and all that I have, I honor you.

Thomas’ Vows:

Jennifer, I love you.

  • I promise to be faithful, trustworthy, and honest with you.
  • I promise to listen to you and only fix the things you ask me to.
  • I’ll do my best to communicate more, even when the topic might be uncomfortable for me.
  • I’ll do my best to compromise, even with my TV habits, such as endless channel flipping.
  • I’ll do my best to support your decisions, even if I might not agree with them.
  • I promise not to become addicted to any more computer games.
  • And I look forward to making our relationship even stronger and spending the rest of my life with you.
  • Jennifer, I give you this ring as a symbol of our vows—and with all that I am, and all that I have, I honor you.

THE PRONOUNCEMENT

Please join me in pronouncing the couple husband and wife:

Tom and Jennifer, we now pronounce you husband and wife.

THE KISS

THE APACHE WEDDING PRAYER

Now you will feel no rain, for each of you will be shelter for the other.

Now you will feel no cold, for each of you will be warmth to the other.

Now you will feel no loneliness, for each of you will be companionship for the other.

Now you are two persons, but there is only one life between you.

Go now to your dwelling place, to enter into the days of your life together.

UNISON PRAYER FOR THE BLESSING OF THE COUPLE

Please join in the Unison Blessing of the Couple by repeating after me:

Jennifer and Tom, may your lives be blessed with health, love, and happiness, and may your home be filled with laughter now and forever.

BLESSING OF THE COMMUNITY

As you have blessed, so may you also be blessed. And may your lives also be filled with health, love, and happiness—and may your homes be filled with laughter now and forever.

INTRODUCTION OF THE COUPLE

Friends, it is my honor and pleasure to introduce to you Lieutenant and Mrs. Thomas and Jennifer Hudson.

RECESSIONAL

These Are Days (10,000 Maniacs)

 

Post-Ceremony

After the recessional, we came back and greeted the guests at their rows and everyone said they loved the ceremony—and some people even asked for copies of it and suggested I post it online. It took awhile to get the pictures started (especially getting the extended families together for each family picture), but once they did, they went pretty well. By this time, too, it was quite warm (although not terribly hot and humid) so I was really warm with all the layers of the dress. I really needed a fresh application of powder to take away the shine I had developed, but I had forgotten to prepare a little makeup bag, and at that point, I had NO idea where my makeup bag was. So, I was more than a little anxious about what I would look like in pictures (as it turned out, some are great and some are way too shiny!).

Bridal Party

Reception

We made it to the train with a few minutes to spare before the 1pm departure. I made sure to tell Chandra (the photographer) to get on the train first, so she could get a picture of Tom’s reaction when he saw the personalized cake topper. So we got on the train and the server announced us and everyone clapped and it was really neat—and I almost missed Tom’s reaction to the topper because in the few minutes since I had talked to the photographer, I had forgotten about it! I actually looked down and saw the photographer and wondered what she was doing down there…and then remembered just as she was snapping the picture! He was SO surprised! He just looked at me, laughed and smiled, and said, “You stinker—you told me you weren’t doing this!” I asked if he liked it and he said he did! Then we just sat down, relaxed for a bit (and gave my feet a chance to rest—I had kicked off my shoes as soon as we sat down), and drank a lot of water! Once the train got moving, we got up and started visiting with all of the tables. Everyone LOVED everything—especially the CDs. (I was worried about having lots of extras—since I made one for everyone—and the only leftovers were for the people who didn’t show.)

Carriage

The carriage ride was very cool. We got a few honks as we rode along the main road (on our way to the side streets) and Tom even got a few salutes! Most of our ride was along the side streets, past all of these old Victorian houses. It was a nice, relaxing way to end the hectic day. One bizarre thing happened, though. As we’re clip-clopping down this one street, I see this woman step out onto her porch holding a baby—and it was my hairdresser who had done all our hair that morning (and who had been doing my hair for the past six months)!! She was like, “Jen!!!!” and I was like, “Hey Heidi!!!!” I had no idea where she lived, and we just happened to go by her house. Strange.


Vendors

Tom’s OCS Graduation

Think you could endure OCS?

By graduation day, each candidate has racked up an average of 122 hours of physical training, 52 miles of hikes, 77 miles of running, 640 pull-ups, 50 rope climbs, and 1350 push-ups. In addition to all the marching and PT, the candidates also complete 200 hours of classroom instruction and 453 hours of practical application. This summer, 1971 candidates began this training program, but only 1589 were able to complete it.

The following pictures encompass the long weekend we spent in Quantico, Virginia, for Tom’s gradation from OCS. Our itinerary included Family Day (Thursday, 9 Aug 01, 1400), the Graduation Parade (Friday, 10 Aug 01, 0900), and the actual Graduation Ceremony (Friday, 10 Aug 01, 1400). Tom also took some pictures of the barracks for us.

Tom’s MSU Graduation

The graduation ceremony itself was quite long…but it was definitely worth it to see Tom graduate! People in attendance included Tom’s mom (Marsha), my mom and stepdad (Jean & David), my dad and stepmom (Mike & Linda), my grandma and her husband (Ruth & Howard), along with Kate, Don, and Angela (see right). We are extremely excited that all these people came to share this day with us!

Kate had always told Tom that she would make it for his graduation—wherever she was living at the time—so she drove up six hours from Louisville, Kentucky to keep her promise! Don and Angela, two very good friends of ours, drove down three hours from Traverse City! We both feel very fortunate to have great friends like this!