Have I turned the corner?

I woke up feeling pretty good yesterday (Saturday), and the feeling continued, and I actually felt…good! šŸ˜€ Good enough to actually work my butt off around the house, getting it ready to sell! No oogyness, no nausea, no pains…just my plain ol’ self! YAY! It was soooooo nice!

We went over to friends for dinner, and I actually felt amazing! It was, I think, the first day IN A LOOOOOONG TIME where I didn’t even think about being pregnant! I wanted to drink with the rest of them and then hop in the hot tub!

This morning I woke up feeling mostly tired (from all the work around the house) but still pretty good. By the end of the day, I was exhausted…but so was Tom!

I can only hope the good mojo continues because it is SO much nicer than feeling like crap!

13 Weeks

WebMD:

Congratulations, Jen! You’re 13 weeks pregnant. Your fully formed fetus, now in about its 11th week of development, measures 2.6 to 3.1 inches from crown to rump and weighs between half an ounce and seven-tenths of an ounce—about the size of a peach. The head is still disproportionately bigger than the body, but the rest of the body is starting to catch up. In fact, your baby is growing rapidly these days. The face is starting to look more human, with eyes moving closer together. Toes and fingers are clearly separate, and ankles and wrists have formed. External genitalia are becoming visible. Intestines are shifting into their proper place, too. Your uterus is filling your pelvis now and starting to grow upward into your abdomen. It probably feels like a soft, smooth ball. If you haven’t put on weight yet because of morning sickness, you’ll begin to now as you start to feel better.

Baby-Gaga:

This is your final week in the first trimester and your little weed continues to grow and grow and grow. Of the three trimesters, this one has been the most important for your little one’s development. Assuming you’ve carefully adopted a healthy diet, continue to exercise and get ample rest, your little one is set up perfectly for even more growth and development in tri-two! Way to go! He or she now weighs about 2.5 ounces and is roughly 3.5 inches in length. Little hairs, known as lanugo, will start to cover their body this week, as their sense of taste and smell are further refined. Their cozy little amniotic sac is also increasing in size and mass as it continues to fill with more fluid.

Fetal Medicine Appointment

Michigan, here we come. šŸ™

The doc said of course I am high-risk, but not THAT high-risk. And if I WAS that high-risk they would WANT to transfer me out of the area to a bigger city. (In fact, when we first mentioned Detroit, the doc’s response was “That’s great!”)

We then basically flat out told him we wanted to stay here and were worried about the stress of moving within two months and he said they couldn’t really do anything about that—as far as they are concerned, the baby is healthy and I am healthy. They are running some tests (like for my thyroid) and they did an EKG, but as they said, I’m good to go in their eyes.

They did a looooooong ultrasound (which we have on DVD, we just haven’t had a chance to pull pics from it yet) and told us everything looks good. The baby is the right size and shape, the heart and umbilical cord are working well, and whatever they look for in the spine and nasal cavity (looking for deformities) is perfect. We got to hear the heartbeat again as well.

So, good news and bad news, all rolled into one.

Seven weeks of sick. Blech.

I am SOOOOOOOO sick of being sick—I am going on SEVEN WEEKS of feeling crappy! And to top things off, I am sleeping worse than before! I am still tired, but not like I was before, when I could fall asleep easily at 8:30 and sleep soundly through the night (well, getting up to pee a few times) until 7:30 the next morning…

What’s changed? Oh, now I have acid reflux! So I can lay down to sleep and feel okay…and then 10 minutes later I am rather uncomfortable just wishing I could burp or barf or something. And then I toss and turn most of the night, with the good/comfortable sleep starting about 4am. šŸ™„

I just hope that the second trimester is better…

12 Weeks

From WebMD:

Your baby now measures about 2.5 inches from crown to rump and weighs between three-tenths of an ounce and half an ounce. It is fully formed, from tooth buds to toenails. Your baby’s job now is to continue to grow big and strong. With the most critical time in your baby’s development behind you, the chance of miscarriage drops considerably after this week. Nausea and energy start to improve but occasional headaches, dizziness and fatigue from hormone changes may be present. If it’s your first baby, you still could be wearing loose-fitting clothes, but if you’ve had other pregnancies, you most likely are back in maternity clothes. The typical weight gain by now is about three to five pounds. Fathers-to-be might also experience pregnancy symptoms, called couvade or “hatching,” during the third month and at delivery, including nausea, abdominal pain, appetite changes and weight gain.

From Baby-Gaga:

Even though your little Einstein’s body is still growing quite rapidly 2 inches long right now, the overall super-speedy growth of their amazing brain continues to leave the head proportionately larger than the body—and is actually slightly more than one third of their total body mass! The head and neck are still straightening at this point as can be seen by their little chin lifting off of the chest. Your baby is also actively rehearsing ā€œbreathingā€ by using amniotic fluid to prepare the lungs for future air respiration.

The big news: your little pooper is now officially going to need diapers! Although a majority of the waste produced is transferred to the mother’s system for discharge (to avoid having it linger in the amniotic sac), some urine is released to the amniotic fluid and your baby will actually breathe it in before it passing it on to your for discharge. Not to worry, urine—in this particular form, is completely harmless to your baby.

11 Weeks

From WebMD:

Your fetus, about the size of a large lime, measures about 1.75 to 2.4 inches from crown to rump and weighs about three-tenths of an ounce. About now the rapid “swooshing” noises of the heartbeat may be heard using an electronic Doppler device. Fingernails and external genitalia are showing distinguishing characteristics, and the baby is swallowing and kicking, although you still won’t feel it. Your uterus is almost big enough to fill your pelvis and may be felt in your lower abdomen. You may also be seeing changes in your hair, skin, fingernails or toenails.

From Baby-Gaga (sometimes a little more humorous take, but not always):

Maybe you’ve noticed… your baby is a super-duper grower! Your lil’ fetus will be gaining a substantial amount of weight this week and has already achieved fruit-size-status comparable to a plum. What’s more, your little scientist is already starting to explore their body, focusing most intently on touching their head, and especially their face and mouth. Their mouth in particular will provide them with hours of entertainment. This happens not only because your baby is gaining coordination, and is therefore able to move a hand on command, but also because their palms have gained sensation and can actually ā€œfeelā€ what it touches.They’re also developing their swallow reflex this week. And lastly, your baby’s smelling and other olfactory senses will begin developing this week, which when combined with the maturing taste buds, will provide your baby with their first experiences of taste and smell.

Midwife Appointment

I just got back from my first appointment with the midwife at my local clinic. (At our orientation, they said since they have so many pregnancies right now, they are trying to spread them out so they don’t get overbooked. Everyone who lives on base or has a high-risk pregnancy goes to the naval hospital, and those who live in town can go to a clinic. I love the clinic since it’s my regular clinic, they know me by name, and it’s two minutes from work.)

First, my blood pressure was high. After assuring them that wasn’t normal, they said they would take it again after my appointment.

The doctor/midwife was very nice and personable. She went through my files (all the paperwork I filled out at the hospital two weeks ago), confirming what I had put and asking more questions.

Due to my age (you know, the dreaded 35 is this September!), she is sending me out in town for a consultation with Maternal Fetal Medicine—to see if I am going to be a high-risk pregnancy or not.

Also, due to past thyroid issues, I am going back to the naval hospital to consult with an actual OB doctor (since it’s a bit outside the scope of the midwife). She said that even if I am not having any issues right now, they can come up after pregnancy, so they just want to be in the loop and take any necessary preventative measures.

Lastly, at the same time I consult with the OB doc, I will also have a consultation with anesthesia—since I am overweight, they just want to make sure (in the case of a caesarean) that my airways are not constricted and an anesthesiologist would have no problems.

I really hope they don’t deem me high-risk, because that means all my future appointments will be on base, instead of at the clinic two minutes from my office.

She asked if I had any questions and I mentioned that I was still sick every day and she said she would give me a prescription for anti-nausea pills. I am debating whether they will work or not, because I really don’t think I have nausea per se (I just feel all around crappy, not specifically nauseous)…but I assured her I wouldn’t take them if they didn’t help.

Then I asked what she thought of me doing the HydroMassage Dry Hydrotherapy.

Hydro Massage: Unique, open design for comfort with a traveling water-jet system for full back and side body massage. Hydro Massage has 39 preset programs for customized, massage sessions that may be recalled at any time with a temperature controlled cooling system. This service is engineered using heat and water pressure to relieve stress, decrease muscle tension, and increase flexibility while leaving tired muscles feeling relaxed and rejuvenated.

HydroMassage

This is a spa treatment offered at my tanning place. Since I stopped tanning when I learned I was pregnant, they said I could turn my tanning membership into a spa membership (at the same rate). I had to wait until this appointment to get my answer. So, now, if I want, I can go get a 20-minute massage once a day!

So, after the questions and whatnot, it was time for the exam. She started with the ultrasound—YAY! I didn’t think I was going to have one today (at the orientation, they stressed that we would have TWO ultrasounds, one of which was that day)! Of course she saw the baby, but all I could see was a big black blob (my uterus) and something that I think might have been the head. But I did see the pulsating dot that was the heartbeat! She said everything looked great.

Then, since I had a pap smear in April, she didn’t have to do that part of the exam, but she still had to do a test for, oh, I forget, gonorrhea and syphilis I think (mandated by the state of North Carolina for all pregnant women).

A quick breast exam (which she said was excellent, and no need for a baseline mammogram until I’m 40) and then I was done. On my way out, I had my blood pressure taken again, and it was still elevated, so they just put a note in my chart and will keep an eye on it.

My next appointment (as far as I know right now) will be in 5-6 weeks (at about 16 weeks) with the OB at the naval hospital. I have to wait 48 hours to call the Maternal Fetal Medicine doctor, so that appointment could likely be in the meantime.

On the way home, I stopped at Planet Beach, gave them my permission note from the doc, and had my first massage! It wasn’t perfect, but it was nice and relaxing…and it’s something I will definitely enjoy getting out of the office for a few times a week!

How many more months?

We have a new keybox system. I was told by the bosses there would be no need for me to keep an inventory any longer. YAY!

Except now they ARE talking about keeping a list of the keyboxes and they are trying to figure out how to do it…which is fine, except OF COURSE they aren’t even considering asking me what I think, since I will be the one keeping the list. I just get to overhear their conversation from where I sit.

Much like when they were considering new means of advertising, which involved a new computerized method of submission, and they didn’t even think to even ask me what my thoughts were.

And it doesn’t matter if I try to speak up and give my opinion, because it won’t matter. Yes, they might listen, but will not take anything I say seriously.

Now you see why I have given up.

And in other news, long story short, my boss has NO sympathy for me whatsoever. After I told her I was pregnant, and how I had felt like shit pretty much 24×7 the past five weeks, she pretty much told me to “suck it up.” Yes, in her joking yet laughing yet totally serious way she has. Isn’t that lovely?

I guess you could argue it wasn’t the very first thing she said. I mean, she did make some small talk asking if we were excited, how far along I was, etc., and then pretty much said “Get up and walk around, you will feel better. That’s what worked for me.”

Which, yes, I appreciate the advice, but like what she does with everything else, she equates it to HER experience and assumes everyone will be just like her. She said she felt bad when she woke up, ate a few crackers, then felt fine. I said yeah, that doesn’t work for me. Then I mentioned that she might see me catnapping at my desk, or have my head in my hands, and THAT is when she said I just needed to “suck it up.”

I don’t need this. I really don’t.

A day or so later, when I actually felt EVEN WORSE, she made a comment to the effect of “Get used to it…you did this to yourself!”

Love it. Just freakin’ love it. 😐

More about the appointment.

So now for more details about yesterday’s appointment.

I knew it was an orientation-type appointment, but they weren’t very clear with instructions. They said to get there 15 minutes early to fill out paperwork, so I was dutifully there 20 minutes early…and they said “Okay, just go have a seat.” Um, okay. So there was no paperwork.

Tom was there with me, and we watched some other women trickle in, but I didn’t pay much attention to them because, well, it is an OB office. I had to go to the bathroom, but didn’t want to because I had been told (on the phone when I made the appointment) that there would be an ultrasound and it helped if you had a full bladder.

So about 8:35 someone came in and announced something (which I couldn’t hear) and a bunch of the women all got up and left. We still sat there because we hadn’t heard what was said and no one had told us what was going on. The woman at the desk motioned to me and said “I think you’re supposed to be with them.” Oh, nice. So we went over to the counter and she looked up my info and said yes, I was supposed to be in orientation. Well, duh, I knew that, but they certainly didn’t make it easy—someone literally stuck their head in the door and said something in a normal voice. I would have thought someone would have come in, stood in front of us, and made a real announcement. šŸ™„

So we walked across the hall and of course they were already started, so I apologized for interrupting. We sat down and listened to a powerpoint presentation on things to do, things not to do, things to eat, things not to eat, who to call with problems, etc…everything that was on the handouts they gave us. Then it was time to fill out the paperwork. Ahhhhh, yes, most of which I could have already had done had they given it to me when I thought they were. The woman did have to explain a few things, but it was no big deal.

I now have to pee worse, and it’s about 9:30. They start taking women for their ultrasounds, and of course I am not being called. I make an educated guess that since I have to pee so badly, I will of course be the last one called, LOL. I went in to the instructor’s office (we were back in the OB clinic by this time) and asked if there was any way I could bump up my ultrasound because I REALLY had to pee. She said “Oh, it’s not that important to have a full bladder, you can go to the bathroom.”

>:XX

So I did, then came back to schedule my physical. The good news is that I can have most of my appointments at my regular clinic (a mile from work) instead of having to drive 20 minutes to the naval hospital on base. (This is, of course, assuming I don’t end up with a high-risk pregnancy.)

As I had guessed, I was the last one called for the ultrasound…but it went well. I layed on the table, she put some gel on my stomach, and I made a comment about how Tom was sure there was nothing in there. The tech made a comment about how she would prove him wrong, and said “There it is!” and Tom and I were both like Where? What? We don’t see anything. It looked like a black hole. So Tom said “I still don’t believe it.” So then the tech said “Okay, then here’s the heartbeat, you can’t disagree with that.”

And it was amazing. She timed it and said it was like 175bpm, which was just perfect. She also measured it and said my due date was fine at February 19.

Then she manipulated it a bit to try and get a good picture. It is so tiny that she had to blow it up quite a bit to get the picture you see. And of course she put the Xs on it so we could have some idea what we were looking at. I found it funny, too, that she labeled it BABY. :>> That said, it was over too soon—I wanted to hear more heartbeat. šŸ™

Then it was off to the lab for blood work…which I was not looking forward to, only because I know I am NOT a good draw. The last time I was there for blood work, they had six people try to draw me, I had about four needle pokes, and they ended up taking it from the back of my hand (very painful). So I told the tech I wasn’t trying to scare him, I was just warning him. So imagine my total amazement when he got me on the first poke and successfully drew seven vials! I told him I was coming back to him each time!

The Official Announcement

Something I (we) have been waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting for has FINALLY happened…Unfortunately, I haven’t quit my job and am still working at the same place…but I will have a “new job” of sorts come February 19th or so!

I had the 10-week ultrasound this morning and there is NOTHING in that picture that is even faintly recognizable to me, but the tech said the head is on the left and the feet (butt?) is on the right. But we did get to hear the little blob’s heartbeat so we do believe it!

I have been dying to say something the past month, to explain why I have felt like crap and why I have been so tired and why I have been offline a lot, but we promised we wouldn’t say anything until the 3-month/12-week cutoff—but then I decided I couldn’t wait, and the 10-week ultrasound would have to suffice! (We were just paranoid about saying anything too soon, since the last pregnancy didn’t end up as we’d hoped. We also didn’t want to get too excited ourselves, since we got overly excited the last time, and then got depressed when it didn’t happen.)

So far, the pregnancy has been MOSTLY awful. XX(

The first four weeks (when I had no clue I was pregnant) were great, LOL. I took the test on Father’s Day and after that, I started to get tired. Very tired. Exhausted, even.

About a week later, I started feeling horrible. JUST HORRIBLE. The strangest sensations I couldn’t even put into words – but definitely horrible. Not morning sickness per se (I never threw up once) but I had nausea, upset stomach, headaches, I could eat a tiny portion but then felt like I ate an entire buffet…every day. I was sleeping a minimum of 10 hours a night and was STRUGGLING to make it through the work day, trying to appear like nothing was wrong (because I didn’t want to tell the bosses). So, work (which is normally hell for me) was 100 times worse because I felt like death. Each weekend was spent between the bed and couch, pretty much sleeping all day. I cursed the day I asked to be knocked up! šŸ˜‰

But knock on wood, I think it’s over…and none too soon because a month of that was making me insane. The past few days I have felt better (not great, but approaching good) and I hope I only feel better from here on out.

Not-Quite-Morning-Sickness

I have decided I have Not-Quite-Morning-Sickness, otherwise known as Daily-Oogy-Sickness.

I talked to my mom this weekend and she told me she threw up just about the whole nine months…so I should be VERY glad I am not experiencing that.

But it is just exhausting being so tired all the time. And always feeling out of sorts.

Work days are the hardest—and especially Mondays, after I’ve been able to nap whenever I want over the weekend.

In a perfect world, I would tell my boss I was pregnant and ask if I couldn’t just go in the back and lie down for a bit. Or hell, since we’re talking a perfect world, if I couldn’t just go home at 3 or so, since that is when I feel the worst.

But I know none of that would happen. I am guessing the attitude would be more like “Sorry you don’t feel good, but we still need you to answer the phones.” Which I guess is true, but it doesn’t make me feel any better.

No blood test.

I went to the doctor’s office this morning to see what I had to do to get a blood test. Why did I want that? Because it’s guaranteed proof that I am pregnant.

Yes, I’ve had two positive at-home tests and one positive doctor’s office test…but that is the same exact thing that happened the last time—so I just wanted to ease my apprehension with a blood test. ESPECIALLY after the last time.

Unfortunately, they didn’t feel the same way.

They said as long as I’m not having any complications (cramping, bleeding, etc.) then they are to assume I am fine (and if I do have those complications, to go to the emergency room).

I am sure I am fine. I feel completely different than I did the last time (more actual pregnancy symptoms, no cramping and bleeding) but I still wanted to set my mind at ease.

The ladies were very nice about it, though, even joking with me (agreeing with me) that I am thinking too much! :yes:

So, I have to wait until July 17th (my first OB appointment) for blood work and/or an ultrasound.

That’s three weeks.

Three agonizing weeks. |-|

Pregnancy test #2

Well I couldn’t stand it anymore. I had to take another test.

As I’ve already mentioned, I’ve been paranoid since day one, sure that I was going to have another chemical pregnancy…so since I had one test left, I decided What the hell and took it.

The result?

Pregnant.

YAY!

But I’m still a little paranoid. :-/

Exhaustion

I am exhausted.

All the time.

Soooooooooo much more than I ever thought or expected I would be this early in the game.

I have a few good hours during the day, but mostly I just want to close my eyes and rest…or nap (which of course is impossible at work, and which I don’t really want to do once I get home, because then I won’t be able to sleep at night)…or plop on the couch and not move.

Oh, and I’m tired of peeing 12 times a day, too. I thought that symptom didn’t start until the baby was big enough to press on my bladder…but after some reading, it can apparently happen now, too…something about there being more blood flow?

Was that a cramp?

For the past few days, at least three times a day, I have sworn I was getting cramps or starting my period. Yes, even though I had a positive at-home test and a positive doctor-administered test.

I am just scared that this can’t be real. And each time I realize I am NOT starting my period, I breathe a little sigh of relief. But it’s very tiring.

On one hand, I try not to think about ANYTHING pregnancy-related, because the more I do, the more excited I will get. But on the other hand, every day (at least 10 times a day) I think “Wow, I’m pregnant.”

Doctor’s test results!

I didn’t go to the doctor on Monday because I had lost my military ID and thought I would need it at the clinic, so spent Monday morning replacing my ID.

So this morning I went to the doc for a walk in pregnancy test. It was torture waiting for the results—I couldn’t call, but had to wait for them to call!

They finally called and told me yes, I was pregnant, and gave me the numbers to schedule my initial OB appointments. Oh, and the anticipated due date is February 22, 2009. Of course, that can change once I actually see a doctor, but it’s a good enough guesstimate for now (an online predictor said 2/20).

On one hand, I was totally geeked…but on the other hand, I was still trying to pretend it was no big deal because I did NOT want to get excited this early.

Wow. Just, wow.

How appropriate for Father’s Day:

Of course, we didn’t want to get too excited, considering what happened the last time (they thought it was a chemical pregnancy) because the same thing could be happening again. So while we are happy, we are trying not to get crazy.

And we have decided not to tell anyone until things are, well, far enough along that we hopefully don’t have to worry…

Inconclusive

I was a few days late, so decided to take a test.

I used a non-digital test—an old one I had leftover from two years ago, one that gives you “lines” results—that I had never had good luck with.

And again, I had no luck. The test was inconclusive. (The “control” window is supposed to have any type of line in it, any amount of color—and nothing appeared. According to the instructions, that meant inconclusive.)

So I went about my day thinking I would take the digital test the next morning—I mean, what better day to find out if we were pregnant or not than on Father’s Day?! :>>

As it happens, that night we were heading over to Mitchell’s for our Hooters wing night and we were BOTH in a mood to drink. Except I was still pretty sure I was pregnant, so I refrained.

Let’s just say it was interesting to be the only sober one for once!

I hate being up at 6am.

I hope this morning is not going to be an indicator of the day.

My phone alarm didn’t go off this morning (I have a haircut at 7:30am) but luckily I woke up.

Then, since I had to pee on a stick yesterday and just assumed I had to do it 10 days in a row (that’s what happened the last time), I peed on the stick without turning on the monitor first…and oops, I didn’t have to pee on a stick, so now the number of sticks I have is off, and if I have to do this one more month, I will be one stick short, meaning I have to spend $30 to buy another pack. This is the first morning since I started the monitor that I didn’t check the stupid thing first. Serves me right, I guess.

THIS is exactly why I should not be up this early. I hate early mornings.

Strange Dreams

So last night I had a dream that I was pregnant and that I gave birth…but it wasn’t a normal pregnancy or a normal birth.

I had no pregnancy belly and the birth was kind of like “Now you are pregnant and now you aren’t” and the next thing I knew, I was holding twins in my hands.

Yes, in my hands. They were about the size of weebles (yes, weebles, you remember them, of the “Weebles wobble but they don’t fall down?” fame?) and one was in red (the girl) and one was in blue (the boy). And they both fit in my cupped hands.

And one of my friends was also in the kitchen and she had also just given birth, and she was telling me how it was now time to put them in the oven. I agreed (it made perfect sense) and we went to the oven and there were other women there putting their babies in the oven, except they looked exactly like pre-baked loaves of bread. And one woman was saying how you had to watch them closely so they didn’t get too brown, and another woman was saying she liked to leave hers in a little longer so they got a nice coloring on them.

And that was it, then I woke up. Tom wonders what I’m eating to give me dreams like this. :p

My first piece of gum!

Well, in almost two months anyway.

You see, I have never been officially diagnosed, but I am pretty sure I have a slight case of TMJ. My jaw has always cracked off and on (like sometimes I can open and close my mouth 20 times in a row and it cracks each time—well, not cracks, like a cracking a knuckle, but like the jaw is popping in and out of joint).

It never really bothered me that much, but before we left for the cruise, I started to notice that if I chewed more than once piece a day, or a few days in a row, my jaw would be very sore.

Well, I didn’t chew gum at all during the cruise, and very infrequently the rest of the two weeks of vacation…until the ride home, when I was trying to stay awake, and then all day afterwards. And come Monday morning? I could barely get my mouth open. I am assuming this was due to the TMJ and having been aggravated by the gum-chewing.

So I decided I had to give up gum. And I went cold-turkey.

Now, keep in mind this was almost like asking me to stop breathing. I have gum at work in my desk, in my car, in my purse, in my nightstand, by the computer, in the kitchen, in Tom’s car—you get the idea. But I had to for the sake of my jaw.

And I bought mints. Lots and lots of mints. And more mints.

But today? I just finally decided I would try a piece of gum—for no more than the time it took to ride into town and get to our destination (15 minutes). Unfortunately, it didn’t even last that long, LOL, as I think we had an old pack of gum and the taste was off and the gum didn’t stay soft very long…so I think it ended up to be less than five minutes.

Luckily, my jaw didn’t hurt from those five minutes. But it made me realize that my jaw hadn’t hurt AT ALL during the past two months…so it looks like gum is no longer a valuable part of my life. :'(

Now, what to do with the 20 packs I have sitting around the house? |-|

Your conclusion?

First things first, let me say I have no way of knowing if I am pregnant, because it’s entirely too early, but there are just unusual things happening, so of course I jokingly tell Tom that I must be pregnant!

A little background: We are on the first month of using the Clear Blue Easy Fertility Monitor. I peed on the stick when it told me to, and we had sex when it said was the best time—so if the sun and the stars and the planets were aligned, there is no reason I shouldn’t be pregnant. :yes:

So, what are the possible (but highly unlikely) signs?

  • I have been feeling weird all the time… Not an upset stomach or gas or nerves or “morning sickness” or anything familiar, but just a strange, unfamiliar weirdness. It’s almost like my insides feel tight.
  • I have to pee ALL THE TIME. Just today, I peed at 3am, 6am, 7am, 9am, and 10am. I only had a smoothie for breakfast—no other liquids.
  • I have had headaches—long, all-day headaches—for some time now.
  • I seem to be tired (or exhausted) all the time.

Taken individually, these signs mean nothing. Hell, even taken together they mean nothing! As I said, it’s entirely too early to be having pregnancy symptoms, even if I do happen to be pregnant (if I was, I would be less than two weeks pregnant—and I don’t think ANYONE can tell ANYTHING at two weeks).

So, in the meantime, I just wonder what it would be like if I actually was pregnant right now. For one, it would be great news, since we have only been trying for two months (actually only one seriously). And for two, it would be scary as hell because, well, just the thought of parenthood is scary—when it becomes a reality?! 88|

Now, don’t get me wrong. We would both be excited. Elated, even.

But in the meantime, we are NOT getting excited in the least. Especially after what happened the last time we did this. šŸ™

So, stay tuned.

Pills, ugh.

I am not good at remembering to take pills. I never have been, and I imagine I never will be. Especially when I am supposed to take them in the morning, with food/milk/lots of water.

Yes, I am talking about prenatal vitamins. I got a new script last week when I was at the docs for my annual exam.

The problem is that I usually eat on-the-go (a smoothie on the way to work) or I am eating something quick before rushing out the door. Very rarely do I drink anything with breakfast (I don’t really count a smoothie as a “drink” although technically I guess it is) so I completely forget to take them.

I know taking them at another time during the day is still better than not taking them at all, so I tend to take them around dinner. Or before I go to bed. Basically whenever I remember. :))

My stupid ankle.

So of the two ankles I sprained three months ago, only the right one really still bothers me. So much so, at times, that I have to resort to wearing the brace. Which really isn’t all that bothersome, to be honest, just a bit annoying because eventually it cuts into my heel ever-so-slightly and I have to mess with the fabric so as not to drive me totally insane.

That said, I have discovered that walking doesn’t seem to bother it much…but standing apparently does. After about two hours of walking and standing on cement at the air show yesterday, my ankle was VERY sore—even as quickly as that night. Like actually-kinda-painful-to-walk-on sore. šŸ™ So I ended up wearing the brace all day and all evening.

And all day today.

Temps are being taken.

So I am on my third thermometer (second basal thermometer). I just couldn’t stand waiting THREE minutes for the temp to register, so had to find a new one.

(On a side note, I am completely surprised at how cheap digital thermometers are. At Walmart, there were some basic ones for like $2.98!)

So this morning was the fourth day I’ve taken my temp, and I have to say this is not a fun thing.

Why?

Well, you’re supposed to do it as soon as you wake up, before you move, before you get out of bed, before you pee, before everything. They tell you you should still be half awake when you take it.

And therein lies the problem.

When I’m still half awake, it’s dark. And I can’t see: I don’t have my contacts in—or my glasses on. And I usually have to pee. Badly. There is really no time to fumble for the light, then the thermometer, then my glasses (so I can read the results). I could skip the writing-it-down part, since the thermometer remembers the last result and I could write it down later, but it’s easier to just write it down then.

So what has actually happened?

I usually get up at about 5:30 or 6 to pee, then go back to bed, then take my temp when I actually am ready to get up—usually around 6:45 or 7.

So I’m technically doing it wrong, but I think I’m still close enough that it shouldn’t be a problem.

So we’ll see.

Next month? The Clear Blue Easy Ovulation Monitor. :>>

Ugh, buying a new thermometer!

So I needed a new thermometer so I can check my temp every morning.

So off I went to Walgreens and bought a store-branded one that said “QUICK 10 SECOND READING!” and yes, it took 10 seconds, but first my temp was 94, a moment later it was 96, and the very next moment was was 97. What is the point of a 10-second read if it’s not in your mouth long enough to be correct (apparently)?

So I took it back.

This time I got a real basal thermometer, and let me tell you it’s strange to see your temperature to TWO decimal points. The yucky thing is this one takes up to THREE MINUTES for a reading. Yep, yuck. And even then, my temperature varied widely—and not even in an increasing manner like before—it was like 97.28 then 96.45 then 98.23.

What gives?

I have to assume this temperature variation is somewhat normal…but it just seems very odd that the first thermometer kept increasing (like it never got a good read) and the second one is all over the place—with temps taken one immediately after the other.

I guess I am just afraid that if the thermometer gives such (to me) skewed results now, what good is it going to be in detecting the temperature increase I’m looking for?

I guess I need to go googling.

Here we go again.

We have decided to start trying again…

Tom has been tested (before he left, actually) and he is fine.

I have been through all of the uncomfortable ultrasound and radiation tests (while he was gone—that was fun by myself) and long story short (no need to go into details about the not-fun procedures) I have a clean bill of reproductive health. The doc says there is no good reason I cannot get pregnant. (He is willing to put me on some “lite” fertility drugs if I choose, but we are waiting a few months just to see what happens.)

So he we go again. šŸ˜€

UGH! Two twisted ankles at 2am!

2:44am

So long story short, I am dogsitting.

Well, she whines as soon as you put her in the crate for the night, and kept whining. And whining. And whining. Not so badly that I couldn’t fall asleep, however. I just attribute it to the fact she knows her buddy Maggie is here and consequently doesn’t want to be in her crate because she would rather be playing.

Fast forward to just a bit ago, when I wake up because she is being even LOUDER than ever. I don’t look at the clock, but go out on the landing to yell at her to be quiet (she is downstairs but directly below the balcony). As I am yelling at her, she sounds even louder, and like she is moving. I turn around, and there she is—coming up the stairs! Damn dog got out of her crate! I obviously didn’t latch it correctly, and she freakin clawed/forced her way out.

So, I was pissed at myself for not doing it right, and pissed at her for not just sleeping (like my dog does—you could not even latch the door and she wouldn’t try to get out—she knows it’s sleep time). But she’s just a dog so what can you do. So I head down the stairs to take her outside and then put her back in the crate.

And then one of my biggest fears happen—in the dark, in my frustration, I miss the last step and go crashing to the floor. Luckily my head missed the marble fireplace (but my leg must have hit it because there is a nasty scrape and bruise forming). I laid there for a few moments, in utter terror and pain, waiting for the shock to wear off so I can tell if anything was broken.

I was crying from the pain—and it felt like both ankles were twisted, although thankfully not broken. The dog is hovering above me, nosing at me, thinking I am playing. I just want to scream and cry. I manage to crawl on my knees to the kitchen to let the dog out, then hobble back to her crate and make sure she is really locked in.

Then I hobble back up the stairs—in major pain with every step—and take some Aleve, then hobble to bed. It is at this point that I look at the clock and see…it’s only 2am. I was hoping it was later, like 6am, so I could just stay up. Of course at this point, my cat decided to yak up a hairball so I had to hobble around cleaning that up.

I emailed my coworker (from my phone) to let her know I might not be in in the morning if I can’t walk. So then I just laid there, both ankles just throbbing and screaming in pain. I have some movement but it hurts.

I have never technically twisted an ankle before, so I don’t know if it’s a true twist or just a sprain or what. Should I go to the doctor in the morning? Or just keep popping pills? Is it going to hurt me to walk on it?

/off to google

2:49am

I see RICE is recommended. Ugh. I am not sure it’s worth it to go BACK downstairs to get ice. So I may just move to compression with ace bandages since those are in the bathroom. But I don’t even want to get up to get those. I may just go with elevation until morning.

7:04am

Okay, nothing looks swollen at all, but I can barely even stand, let alone walk. Friends are taking me to the doc, as I don’t trust myself to drive. Called my coworker and boss and left messages. I hope the doc can wrap them or give me crutches… I have no idea how I am going to go up and down the stairs a million times this weekend for the dogs.

3:10pm

Well, I am home and waiting for the Vicodin to kick in.

At 8am I showed up to my regular clinic, at which point they told me I had to go to the ER (base, of course) since they didn’t have x-ray facilities. Luckily my friend was able to take me. Let me just say I am not thrilled with the treatment there.

I hobble in, can barely walk or stand, tell the ER person what happened, and she tells me to take a form and “go over there by the window to fill it out.” 88| I should have asked for the wheelchair right then, but I was in too much shock that she didn’t offer. So I hobbled over, filled out the form, hobbled back, and she told me to go have a seat in the waiting room—literally 20 yards down the hallway. At this point my friend was coming back in from having parked the car in BFE, saw my distress, and asked for a wheelchair since I couldn’t walk. A wheelchair appeared immediately. I just wonder why they didn’t think of that themselves when I came in and said “I fell down the stairs and can’t walk.” šŸ™„

I didn’t have to wait that long before I was taken to radiology, but I had to go back in THREE times to redo x-rays that they messed up. First the tray was in backwards. Then they reused a tray that hadn’t been cleared so I had a wrist on my ankle. Ugh. I know mistakes happen (I mean, after all, that’s how I fell down the stairs) but that was kind of like strike #2.

Then it was back out to the waiting room, where the wait sucked, but it really wasn’t THAT bad—maybe an hour? I got wheeled into the actual ER and layed on the bed. Unfortunately, we were in there for almost two hours just waiting. At about 1:30 my friend went out and asked when we might be seen, just curious (because we saw docs walking around and lots of people not doing anything) and they said they only had one doc on until 2pm. (It would have been really nice had someone told us this when we first came in, or any time while we were waiting.) Interestingly, a doc was there five minutes later. He was nice enough, but he asked me if I had had x-rays taken yet. Um, I take it he didn’t even look at my chart. So he said he had to go check the x-rays and get back with us. Good lord you would think he would have already looked at the x-rays before even coming to see me.

So after another 30 minutes or so he came back and said he didn’t see any breaks so it was probably just ligaments or muscles. He didn’t seem like he was going to say anything else, so I asked him if I was going to get drugs. I asked him if I was going to get my ankles wrapped (he said “when you wrap your ankles” and I was like “Aren’t you going to wrap them for me?”). I asked if I was going to get crutches. It was like he wasn’t clued in AT ALL. I thought he would have came back and said “It doesn’t appear to be broken. We will wrap your ankles, give you Vicodin, and give you crutches.” But I guess I was expecting too much.

Here is my pathetic self leaving the hospital.

Jen on crutches

So, I went in at 8:30 and got out at 2, which is par for the course from what I’ve heard. It wasn’t that bad I guess, just frustrating that no one kept us updated on anything, when there were literally 10 nurses/support staff/etc. wandering around the whole time, talking about what they were doing for lunch, etc.

I thank god for my (our) friend Ursula, who sat with me the whole time. I am thankful she works with her husband in real estate and was able to be away from the office all day. She brought me home, gathered everything I said I would need, and even turned on lights throughout the house so if I fell asleep, there would be lights on when I got up. I am also thankful for my neighbors (Rob and Cindy) who are coming down tonight to let the dogs out. Hopefully I can do it myself later in the weekend but I want to try to stay immobile as much as possible for the first 24 hours.

As far as sleeping on the couch downstairs… it is possible. I would have the laptop (no TV, but could watch movies on the laptop) and a toilet. But my dog would still be upstairs (where her crate normally is). The dog I’m sitting for—her crate is downstairs. So no matter where I am, one dog is on the other floor. So I am in the living room upstairs with the phone, drugs, laptop, TV, pillows, blanket, water, and snacks…until the neighbor comes over at 7:30 to check on me and the dogs.

Unfortunately, Tom has no idea what’s going on. I emailed him at 2am (right after it happened) and then he called when I was on my way to the ER. But while we were at the hospital our phones had to be off so he called like five times and I obviously didn’t answer so he doesn’t know if I have two broken ankles or what. Poor guy, even called my friend’s husband in case he knew anything—which he didn’t either because her phone was off, too.

This just really really sucks. Our cruise is a hair over a month, and I just have this feeling I will not be up to par by then. I mean, I totally hope otherwise, but… with TWO sprained ankles, it’s not like I can walk on one and baby the other. When I walk, I have to walk on BOTH, so I don’t think either one is going to heal as quickly. I am not sure about work, either—I am supposed to keep my feet elevated, but that is impossible at work—and when I asked the doc, he said “just do your best.” What the hell does that mean? Ugh.

So, the Vicodin still hasn’t kicked in and it’s been over an hour.

5:07pm

Well my bosses called to see if I needed anything, so I asked them to bring me Chinese. In the meantime, my neighbor called and said he was bringing down pot roast, so I would be set for a few meals! Rob (our doctor neighbor!) stopped in my kitchen and brought the salt and pepper and silverware. I love him. He also assured me the next dose of Vicodin would help more (it builds up in your system), plus I could also take additional meds on top of it. And that the pain should subside a lot tomorrow. Here’s hoping. And I asked him about the ER doc I had (since he works at the same hospital) and he said yeah, that guy is okay, competent, but not great. Oh, it was also good timing as the dogs were whining to go out. Shortly after he left, my bosses arrived.

9:50pm

Rob has been great. He came down twice, brought me dinner (which will be lunch tomorrow), and brought me other drugs (he’s the doc). I just hate having to ask for help, which I know is ridiculous because I would drop everything to help these neighbors if/when they called. So I know they would do the same for me (which they are doing) but I still hate asking. Like just a bit earlier, I knew I wanted to go to bed, and he hadn’t been back yet for the dogs’ last walk, so I had to call. He was down within two minutes. Then after he left his wife called to tell me her schedule for tomorrow so I would know when I could call. I love them. I love all our friends. They rock.

I am just waiting for Tom to call so I can fill him in. At this point, as far as he knows, I could have two broken ankles…

Sunday, February 3—1:23pm

I am doing even better today—quite a difference from Friday when I swore it would be weeks before I was walking again. I have cut out the Vicodin and am just using Motrin at this point, and I am barely using the crutches. So, it looks like I will be going to work tomorrow, although from past experience, I know that by the end of the day, my ankles will be SORE, since now I am used to having them elevated all day.

Wednesday, February 6—9:25pm

The ankles are getting better. I gave up the crutches Monday night, and just kept taking the Motrin and icing my ankles (and keeping them elevated) at night. Today I gave up the ankle wraps and actually bought a pre-formed ankle wrap from the medical supply place (I have to go back tomorrow to get a second one – they were out of stock). I wasn’t sure how much difference one of these wraps would make, but at the end of the day, the ankle with the wrap hurts less.

So I am walking okay, albeit still slowly—and taking great precaution on the stairs. And I am bruising nicely.