SMITH/HUDSON WEDDING CEREMONY
August 18, 2001
Grand Traverse Children's Gardens
Traverse City, Michigan
10:30am
~ Wedding Program ~
Click on any of the four wedding program pages to see a full-size version in a new window.
~ PRELUDE ~
Various Classical Selections
~ PROCESSIONAL ~
Variations on a Theme by Paganini (Rachmaninoff)
Seating of the mothers (Grandma, Marsha, Linda, Jean) by Tom
That's How You Know It's Love (Deana Carter)
Groom's Attendants (Kate, Don, Morgan)
Best Man (Rob)
Groom (Tom)
Bride's Attendants (Marie, Kathryn, Beth)
Maid of Honor (Angi)
Flower Girl (Jessica)
Trumpet Voluntary (Clarke)
Bride & Father (Jen and Mike)
~ THE PRESENTATION OF THE BRIDE ~
Who presents this bride for marriage? Her parents. (Dad hands Jen off to Tom. Tom shakes Dad's hand. Jen kisses Dad on cheek. Jen and Tom walk together to front and face the guests.)
~ WELCOMING OF THE GUESTS ~
Good morning. I'm Reverend Julie Chai and I have the honor of officiating this marriage ceremony which Jennifer, Tom, and I have co-created. On behalf of Tom and Jennifer, I would like to welcome all of you to this ceremony celebrating the love they have for each other. We would also like to welcome those who have passed on and are celebrating with us in spirit today—especially Tom's father, Robert.
We would like to take this opportunity to introduce you to the parents of the couple. Would the parents please stand? On your left is Tom's mother, Marsha, and Jennifer's mother Jean and stepfather David. On your right, her father Michael and stepmother Linda.
~ QUESTIONS TO THE PARENTS ~
As the parents of Thomas and Jennifer, do you affirm your continuing support and love to them as they grow in their marriage? Yes.
Do you celebrate with them in their decision to choose each other? Yes.
Do you offer them the best of your care and counsel in times of struggle, and will you celebrate with them in times of joy? Yes.
~ THE ROLE OF THE COMMUNITY ~
As the much loved friends and family of the couple, you are very important to them and your role in their marriage is a very important one as well. Today you will be witnesses to the vows they will be making uniting them as a couple. As witnesses, they ask that during times of stress, you offer them a quiet listening ear, advice when requested, and encouragement to uphold their vows, honoring the love they have found in each other. It is our hope that as we celebrate the love of Jennifer and Tom here today, that you will also cherish and hold more dear your own loving relationships. And as they take their vows, that you, too, will find renewed commitment in the relationships you have made in the sacredness of your own lives.
~ ABOUT THE COUPLE ~
I asked Tom and Jennifer why they want to get married and what is drawing them to each other. Tom noted that he was first attracted to Jennifer's eyes and smile. He said, "I love her personality and sense of humor. We are so much alike that it's comforting. She's easy to be around." To this Jennifer quickly added, "It feels like we've been together forever." Tom agreed, noting that they often know what each other is thinking and he said, "Jennifer is my best friend and I couldn't think of being with anyone else."
Jennifer remembered the first time they met, saying, "When we saw each other across the smoky bar and met [big laugh from the guests!], we knew that night we would get married." She said that she loves the fact that Tom loves her unconditionally, no matter what. And she appreciates how easygoing Tom is and how he gets along with everyone in her family. Finally, she noted, "Tom does his best to make me happy, including the cute little animal noises I love." [Everyone laughed. Then, still laughing, Julie asked if anyone had ever heard these noises—because she kept hearing about them but had never actually heard them. Everyone laughed again.]
~ WORDS OF SPIRITUAL SIGNIFICANCE ~
And now Jennifer's Aunt Marge will offer some thoughts on love:
Love is caring as much about the welfare and happiness of your spouse as about your own. It makes burdens lighter because you divide them and joys more intense because you share them. Love is a promise that is always kept, a fortune that can never be spent, and love is a seed that can flourish even in the most unlikely places.
And now Jennifer's brother-in-law, Jim Coe, will read an excerpt from The Art of Marriage:
A good marriage must be created. Remember that it is the little things that are the big things. It is never being too old to hold hands...remembering to say I love you at least once a day...never going to bed angry...and at no time taking the other for granted. In a good marriage you have a mutual sense of values and common objectives. And you stand together facing the world. In a good marriage you do things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy. You speak words of gratitude and demonstrate it in thoughtful ways. In a good marriage, the husband is not expected to wear a halo, or the wife the wings of an angel. You do not look for perfection in the other, but cultivate flexibility, patience, understanding, and a sense of humor. You forgive and forget. A good marriage is not only about marrying the right partner, but being the right partner.
~ SYMBOL OF UNITY ~
As a symbol of their unity, Jennifer and Tom have chosen a bell. During times of conflict and pain they will ring this bell. In ringing the bell, they will be reminded of the love that unites them and surrounds them here today. The ringing of the bell by the couple.
~ THE HANDS OF THE BRIDE AND GROOM
[Note: At this point, we finally get to turn towards each other.]
Jennifer, hold Tom's hands, palm up.
Jennifer, these are the hands of your best friend—young, strong, and vibrant as he promises to love you all the days of his life.
These hands will work alongside yours as you build your future together, laugh and cry, and share your innermost secrets and dreams.
Though large and strong, these are the hands that will be so gentle as he holds your baby for the first time.
These are the hands that will work long hours for you and your new family.
And these hands will love and cherish you throughout the years in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy.
Jennifer, bless these hands you hold before you this day.
Thomas, hold Jennifer's hands, palm up.
Tom, these are the hands of your best friend—smooth, young, and carefree as she promises to love you all the days of her life.
These are the hands that will hold you tight as you struggle through difficult times.
These hands will hold you with joy and excitement and hope each time she tells you that you are to have another child, that together you have created a new life.
These hands will console and comfort you.
And these hands will love and cherish you throughout the years in sickness and in health, in sorrow and in joy.
Tom, bless these hands you hold before you this day.
Please join in the unison prayer for the blessing of the vows by repeating after me:
Jennifer and Tom, we your friends and family celebrate your love and with our love bless the vows you are about to make. Receive the patience, courage, wisdom, and humor you need to grow together, and fulfilling your vows now and forever.
~ THE VOWS OF THE COUPLE AND EXCHANGE OF RINGS ~
Jennifer's vows:
Thomas, I love you.
I promise to affirm my love for you by giving you a quick wink and a smile to let you know everything is okay.
I promise to hold you and comfort you to make you feel safe.
I promise to try to appreciate the good in everything.
I promise I will give you time to work things out when you feel overwhelmed.
I promise to do my best to accept the time it takes you to analyze and make a purchase.
I promise to accept your quirkiness and unique sense of humor.
I'll do my best to understand your need to have the TV on all the time.
I promise to do my best to understand and accept your future military responsibilities and not make you feel guilty about having to put studying first.
I'll do my best to try not to watch QVC as much.
I promise to never put another sugarprincess sticker on my car, just in case you ever have to drive it.
I look forward to making our relationship even stronger and spending the rest of my life with you.
Thomas, I give you this ring as a symbol of our vows—and with all that I am, and all that I have, I honor you.
Thomas' Vows:
Jennifer, I love you.
I promise to be faithful, trustworthy, and honest with you.
I promise to listen to you and only fix the things you ask me to.
I'll do my best to communicate more, even when the topic might be uncomfortable for me.
I'll do my best to compromise, even with my TV habits, such as endless channel flipping.
I'll do my best to support your decisions, even if I might not agree with them.
I promise not to become addicted to any more computer games.
And I look forward to making our relationship even stronger and spending the rest of my life with you.
Jennifer, I give you this ring as a symbol of our vows—and with all that I am, and all that I have, I honor you.
~ THE PRONOUNCEMENT ~
Please join me in pronouncing the couple husband and wife:
Tom and Jennifer, we now pronounce you husband and wife.
~ THE KISS ~
~ THE APACHE WEDDING PRAYER ~
Now you will feel no rain, for each of you will be shelter for the other.
Now you will feel no cold, for each of you will be warmth to the other.
Now you will feel no loneliness, for each of you will be companionship for the other.
Now you are two persons, but there is only one life between you.
Go now to your dwelling place, to enter into the days of your life together.
~ UNISON PRAYER FOR THE BLESSING OF THE COUPLE ~
Please join in the Unison Blessing of the Couple by repeating after me:
Jennifer and Tom, may your lives be blessed with health, love, and happiness, and may your home be filled with laughter now and forever.
~ BLESSING OF THE COMMUNITY ~
As you have blessed, so may you also be blessed. And may your lives also be filled with health, love, and happiness—and may your homes be filled with laughter now and forever.
~ INTRODUCTION OF THE COUPLE ~
Friends, it is my honor and pleasure to introduce to you Lieutenant and Mrs. Thomas and Jennifer Hudson.
~ RECESSIONAL ~
These Are Days (10,000 Maniacs)