Fingers crossed.

It’s official. Tom and I have started yet again. Hopefully for the last time.

I’m tired of feeling like shit after gaining back almost everything I lost back in 2015-2016.

I’m beyond tired of being tired and having everything hurt and never having any energy to do anything.

I’m tired of hating myself in every picture.

I’m tired of getting winded walking up a flight of stairs.

I’m tired of buying clothes when I literally have an entirely new wardrobe in my closet. (And I hate staring at a closet full of clothes I can’t wear.)

So even though I absolutely love food and sugar (and margaritas!) and I have zero energy for exercise…and even walking makes everything hurt…I have got to do this. Got to.

I’ve figured out some reasons why it was easier the last time… One, I was younger.  But two, and most importantly, we didn’t really see friends that often for meals. Huh? Why would that matter? Well, it was easier to just have our little meals and use our timers and everything. When we did have a party or dinner with friends, it was one night of debauchery. 

These days? We usually eat dinner with our best friends anywhere from 2-5 nights a week. Sometimes with apps and always with drinks. SINCE BEFORE THE PANDEMIC. And we go out for dinner probably 2x a month. Is it any wonder I’ve gained it all back?

I’m not sure how I’m going to do this going forward because I’m not sure if I’m strong enough to do all the right things all the time… But I have to try. One day at a time.

Fingers crossed.

One month in and I’m down 15.9#!

Notes on my first month?

✔️ I can definitely feel my clothes loosening a bit so that’s exciting.

✔️I still haven’t taken measurements so that’s on my to do list.

✔️I haven’t been walking as much as I’d like since it’s been so cold.

✔️I am legit eating about 1/3 the amount of food I was eating before — but don’t worry, I’m definitely not starving myself. We honestly just don’t need that much food to survive.

✔️I have only had that one shot of tequila about two weeks ago — and no other alcohol. For a month. That hasn’t happened since pre-pandemic times.

✔️The only sugar I’ve really had was a bit of brown sugar on a dessert pizza (with pancetta), syrup on half of a homemade waffle, and a tiny nibble of a pseudo-Crumbl sugar cookie.

I really think I can do it this time. All my other attempts failed after 2-3 weeks.

I feel so slow and plodding…

I did not want to go outside. It was gray and windy and 25° and my feet hurt. But I made an effort. Not my best day but better than staying on the couch.

I keep wondering “Was I this slow way back when?” Because of course I can only remember the good times from when I was thin and speedy.

So I’m just telling myself I’m happy I’m out moving.

Week 1 check-in!

Week 1 check in — down 5.4# and 4% of my goal completed. #170by50
I’m not gonna lie, I’m a bit disappointed. Usually the first week checks in at about 9-12. I could have walked more but I think 3 out of 7 days for my first week is pretty good.
“Breakfast” was H2OJ and lunch is garlic cheese curds and garlic kielbasa with spicy dill pickle almonds. Which turned out to be too much—I’m full after half!
Don’t worry, I won’t be doing a full check-in every day. Today was just weigh-in day!

I’m giving myself 19 months.

Okay, friends. Be gentle with me. 🥰

This is completely embarrassing to post because it shows my failure. And the before pictures are awful. 🤮 But I’m hoping that my journey might help inspire some of you here as well so…

I was soooo proud of myself back in 2015-2016 when I lost 141#! I was on top of the world! 🌎

I was finally thin for the first time in my life. I swore I would keep the weight off because it had been technically easy to lose and the process was easy enough to maintain.

Until it wasn’t.

A few pounds here, a few pounds there. It’s okay, I told myself, I’ve still lost 130#! Then 120. Then 100# is still amazing! 🤦🏻‍♀️ The saying is true—you can’t gain 20 if you don’t gain 10.

But it continued. A PCS (military move), no friends, a new lifestyle, excuses, no exercise (I missed my most awesome walking trail through the woods). But I was still able to wear the clothes I had (I had kept a single size above my lowest weight).

But then we had friends! YAY FRIENDS! And we were always having dinners and parties and cookouts and drinking and all the things.

🦠And then COVID. And we drank even more than we used to. And didn’t exercise. And ate even more. I tried halfheartedly a few times and would lose 10-15 but would then immediately gain it back.

But about a week ago I decided it was time to get serious. My acid reflux is back with a vengeance (I totally forgot I used to have that), I’ve had to obviously buy fat clothes again, I’m winded by the easiest things, I have arthritis in my knee, and my skin feels tight all over because too much fat is stuffed in there. 🐖

I think my body knew I needed a serious reset as I got struck with a stomach bug that kind of jump started my new (old) lifestyle. I haven’t really been hungry in a week so I’m enjoying it while it lasts. And I’ve started walking again (which I posted in here the other day). 🚶🏻‍♀️

🎯My goal is to lose EVERYTHING again by the time I’m 50… which gives me 19 months. And I’m posting publicly so I will have major accountability. And to ask y’all for support, whether it’s via your thoughts, your keyboard, or in person. This is much harder this time around but I know I can do it. I HAVE TO DO IT.

HERE WE GO!

It’s been awhile for a margarita…

I stopped drinking because I’m trying to lose weight and margaritas don’t work with that plan…and I’m not a fan of diet drinks (Skinny Girl margarita? Barf). Once in awhile I will have a small cherry vodka and pop… Not very exciting but it’s something to drink by the fire instead of water. But I’m down 12# so there is that.

So, accountability time, folks.

Remember me saying I was trying to lose weight…again? Well, things went SMASHINGLY well for 2+ weeks and I lost almost 20# (I think it was 17). YES, THAT MUCH. I was feeling motivated. I was being strong. I was surviving without margaritas. I knew I could do it.

And then.

A minor slip up—one drink with a friend to celebrate a reunion. And then another minor slip up—an extra piece of pizza at my kids’ birthday pool party that I ate without even thinking. And then honestly I kind of lost track after that because…summer, friends, BBQs, late nights, kids being away, vacation, etc. And I wasn’t as strong as I thought I was so I gained 16 of those 17 back and could just kick myself.

This Monday I was back at it again. Because I know I can do this. I have to do this. I worked too hard the first time around to let myself slip farther.

I’m down a few so far this week. It’s better than going up so I’m thrilled. Now I only have *cough*grumble*cough* more to go. 😂

Who wants to be my accountability buddy since this crazy kid is a good walking partner but not much help otherwise…?! 😂

Sidenote: Owen and I might have the same size shoes!

FRIENDS, IT’S ACCOUNTABILITY TIME.

Most of you know I lost a lot of weight a few years ago. And it was mostly easy–141 pounds in 1.5 years eating whatever I wanted with just walking as my exercise? Sign me up! And I swore I’d never let myself get that heavy again. But friends, maintenance is a slippery slope and a few pounds here and there add up. No, I am not back to my original weight, but I have gained back an embarrassing amount. 🤦‍♀️

I have tried to restart a handful of times now–and have lost like 10# each time–but I always went back to my bad habits pretty quickly. I mean, MARGARITAS, y’all…and all. the. food. all. the. time. And I mean ALL the food.

But, shit got serious when my pants went past just being tight and actually stopped fitting. Like can’t even get them on to zip them. Since I had followed Naturally Slim rules, I had gotten rid of all my bigger sizes so I wouldn’t be tempted to let myself get back to that size…so it was yoga pants, leggings, and maxi skirts for me! But then I remembered that I had actually kept like 3 pair of jeans in one size up…so those are now in my closet.

BUT NOT FOR LONG!

Tom and I have BOTH restarted Naturally Slim again. We are on Day 5 and I am currently down 10.2 pounds! (Man oh man do I love the first week back on the plan!) And I have walked every morning (with the kids!) this week.

So, I did it once…I can do it again. I simply have to. I have too many damn cute clothes in my closet that I want to wear again!! 😜

I’m down 13 in one week!

Just in case you weren’t sold on Naturally Slim or didn’t think it was magic… Listen up.

Remember from my earlier post that I gained a whopping THIRTEEN pounds while on the cruise (I ate and drank ALL THE THINGS and then ate and drank some more and then had some more for good measure).

Well, in my first week back on NS, I lost all 13 (13.8 to be exact)!! 😳🤩🤗 Now I know a big chunk of that was water weight (my ankles look and feel normal now!) but holy shit, y’all—even I didn’t expect that big of a loss (but I’ll take it)!

The best part is that now I am super geeked about NS again, which is good because I’ve gained *cough grumble* an embarrassing chunk over the past two years…and it’s high time it came off.

I am SO ready to get back down to my goal weight…

An impressive amount of weight gain.

I have to say I am very impressed with myself as to just how much weight I gained during our cruise vacation. I knew it was my last hurrah before starting Naturally Slim again HARD CORE, so I went ALL OUT, eating and drinking all the things…and then eating and drinking some more.

We had the unlimited premium beverage package….so there was lots and lots and lots of alcohol. And first breakfasts and second lunches and snacks and extra starters or entrees. By the end of the week I didn’t even want to think about alcohol (which is good, but I’m not sure how long it will last!) and I was actually TIRED of eating.

So today I’ve had two huge glasses of H2OJ and one piece of 4″x4″ thin crust pizza… I have pretty much been at L2 all day…BURNING FAT BABY!!

Oh yeah, how much did I gain? THIRTEEN POUNDS. Yes, 13.

TRUTH BOMB TIME

I’ve been struggling with my weight loss reboot. I’ll lose 5-10 then gain it back. Lather, rinse, repeat. (Lather, rinse, repeat.) I partially blame margaritas because DAMN they’re just so good. And I blame my own attitude: I’ve still lost 110# overall and holy crap that’s awesome…right? But I feel blah lots of the time…and fat (some of my clothes are way tighter than they should be). I created a Facebook group (for friends in the same boat) to help with accountability but even that hasn’t helped as much as I’d hoped. I am annoyed at myself for slacking on the NS principles and letting my weight balloon up 30# because I KNOW BETTER and NS couldn’t be easier. I feel guilty I have just seemingly lost any willpower I’ve had. I know I can do this…I just need to DO IT. So I keep trying. All I can ever do is keep trying.

Naturally Slim, Round 2

When it’s time to get serious about Naturally Slim again. Plus I already have my walk in for the day. #icandothis #ididitonceicandoitagain #failureisnotanoption #facebookaccountability

Lunch!

20 minutes later

I posted the above on Facebook and within minutes, a friend suggested we support each other by checking in via text message. I knew a bunch of my friends were all wanting to reboot as well, so asked who would be interested and quite a few were so I decided to start a Facebook group where we can all post and commiserate and help each other out. I think by the end of the day we had maybe 25 people and a week later we are around 50!

That’s about 140# of coconut oil!

Or what I’ve lost thanks to Naturally Slim! (Thanks to friend and fellow NatSlimmer Brad for helping!)

I originally wanted to do this with tubs of Crisco but just never got around to it at home. Then I told Marcia about it and we were going to stop by Sam’s Club but we just never seemed to have enough time!! So after lunch at Ida Claire, I asked my Brad Uber if there was a Costco between the restaurant and the airport and if we had time…and he said yes! We did get a few strange looks while we were unloading and rearranging the buckets, but not one single person said one word!

Recording my Naturally Slim testimonial!

First and foremost, I finally got to meet Bryan! I’ve “known” him online for about 10 years on the Tivo forums but we’ve never actually met. Come to find out last year—long story short—he lost 140 pounds on Naturally Slim and has kept it off for three years now. He was one of the two people who were initially responsible for me joining NS. 🙂

Bryan befire and after Naturally Slim

He is a videographer/producer by trade (617 Production Group) and had been doing the videos for the program and after many years he had an AHA moment and never looked back. His company no longer does the official program videos but Marcia does call him in for stuff like this. And especially for my testimonial since I know him!

We were recording it at Bryan’s church because it was the most convenient place. The sun was in my eyes…

…so this is apparently my look as I’m figuring out if this new spot will work.

Getting ready to start!

A pic Bryan snapped during the filming.

2016-10-01-22-00-24

The whole thing was just…odd. And surreal.

First, even though Marcia was asking me questions, you won’t ever hear her asking them…so you have to rephrase/include the question in your answer. So if she asks “What was the easiest thing about Naturally Slim?” you’d have to start your response with “The easiest thing about Naturally Slim…” Of course, not every question led to a response that was that easy to formulate and I often had to take a moment to think how I was going to respond to get the question in. The good thing (which took some getting used to) is knowing that it will all be cut and edited for the best sound bite, so even though everything was recording, it won’t all be used. That was also helpful when I was answering a question, yakking on and on, and then suddenly losing my train of thought or realizing I had veered violently away from where I’d been headed with my answer and I would just stop and say “Yeah, that’s it. I lost it.” Marcia had told me to just pretend I was having a conversation with her, but honestly, it’s a lot harder to answer questions when you know someone is counting on you to give sound bite answers. That said, every so often as I answered a question, I’d see Marcia do a mini fist pump showing she loved my response. After one (which I don’t even remember what I was talking about), she said she really wanted to use it at the end of week one! So who knows, maybe I’ll actually be in the official videos!!

Second—and I touched on this above—is that I often veered totally off course as I was answering a question. I remember a time or two when I’d be talking and talking and then suddenly I was also thinking “Wait, that is NOT anything related to what they asked.” I would ask if they wanted me to start again or try another take and the answer was generally no, because even if I didn’t answer the specific question, there was still usable sections or they liked the direction I went. I did have to retell a story once because I mentioned IKEA and they said I couldn’t say that just in case a competitor ever used the program. So then I worried about telling the story again and hoping I got all the same excitement and inflections…and who knows if I did or not. Time will tell.

Overall they said it went very well—even though I felt I was completely ridiculous and out of my element—and we talked for about 30-40 minutes. I know Bryan’s company can work magic, but I am still crossing my fingers that I come off natural.

Afterwards, I asked Marcia and Bryan who wanted to get in my pants. 🙂 Seriously—I had brought my FAT PANTS and had thought it would be fun to get two people into the one pair of pants. (This did not surprise them—they had both been forewarned.) Marcia is SUCH a good sport and agreed to do it. First, though, Bryan recorded a snippet of me trying on the pants, so hopefully I’ll get to see that in the end. And then this happened…they were stretched out a bit more than when I actually wore them, but STILL. Two of us in one pair of pants. Good times. Again, SUCH a good sport.

2016-10-01-17-58-28-fat-pants

I have no idea when I will see a finished product, but you know I will let everyone know as soon as I see something. And don’t get your hopes up that it will be a 20-minute piece. It is likely to be a 20-second snippet here or there in a compilation of other testimonials. Fingers crossed!!

The live Facebook Q&A with Naturally Slim!

So the Live Facebook event was actually going to take place at the combined offices of Holmes Murphy and ACAP Health, both new partners of Naturally Slim. I was VERY anxious about the event, but Marcia assured me I would do just fine. I was put a little more at ease when she told me it would only be about 20 minutes long—I had thought it would be an hour or something! Phew!

We got there early and Marcia showed me around the offices and introduced to many, many people…most of whom were all like “Oh, wow! I know you! You’re Jennifer Hudson! I recognize you!” It was VERY surreal. They were just as excited to meet me as I was to meet them! The offices were super fun and trendy, with named meeting rooms like the Vineyard (with a wall of bookcases and wine racks) and the Bead Room, which is where we ended up filming—yes, a “room” in the middle of the office space with floor-to-ceiling hanging beads encircling four chairs and a table!

Getting ready to start!

Our view during the event:

And then we were off and running…

Live Q&A with Marcia Upson, President of Naturally Slim
[iOS users, if Safari isn’t showing the Facebook video below, try Chrome]

And suddenly it was over! What?! Already?! Wow that went fast! I had a lot of fun and the time just flew by—I probably could have answered questions for an hour! Of course watching the video later I noticed things I didn’t like (like my roll of belly fat and a few strange looks I made) but overall I think I did pretty well!

And then on the way out, I got to meet Todd (Todd Whitthorne, President, ACAP Health—he’s in quite a few of the program videos)!! And just like Marcia, he was just the same as in the videos, too. And boy was he tall (I’m 5’9″ and you see how he towers over me)! 🙂

2016-09-30-11-33-41

What a memorable way to spend my 43rd birthday!!