So you know we have our old dishwasher to sell. Since I work in a real estate office, I put a homemade ad up on the bulletin board. So an agent from our office calls me at home one night and asks if the dishwasher is still available. I say yes. She says she is working with someone who needs to replace a dishwasher. (I think, from what I remember, that she is referring to the LISTING agent and not her actual client.) She gives me the person’s phone number.
I call her and she is about clueless—or just has no phone etiquette. I left her a message, so when she called back, the conversation went like this:
ME: This is Jennifer, how can I help you?
HER: This is Betty.
I wait for more helpful information and search my brain for her name. And I wait… Finally, after a good 10 seconds when she still hasn’t said anything, I say:
ME: Oh, you wanted my dishwasher.
—Looooooong pause.—
ME (again): I was wondering when you wanted to set up a time to see it or pick it up?
HER: Well it’s not for me.
At this point I realize this is not going to be easy. So, to make this long story short, this dimbulb wanted to know if we could deliver and/or install it. Um, NO. Who do you think you’re buying this from? So she said she’d have to call me back after she found out who was going to pick it up. Okay, fine.
So the next call is even worse. She tells me that ABC company is going to handle the pickup and installation, when are we available? I say after 5 and this weekend. “Oh,” she says, “they don’t work after 5 or on the weekend. Can we pick it up during the day?” Um, hello? I work during the day. And I told her as much. She says—are you ready?—do you have a garage that you could leave it in, and we could just come pick it up? So not only did she want me to take time off work to be home so they could pick up the dishwasher, but now she wants me to leave my garage open instead? I told her that was NOT an option. And she seemed genuinely surprised. So she revisits the idea of picking it up during the day, and I reassure her that is NOT an option—that my husband and I both work. So now she’s got to call back again once she gets more information.
So she calls back and says GOOD NEWS—the company can pick it up on the weekend if that would be better. Okay, fine, Saturday. Then she says “I don’t have to call you again to let you know what time they’ll be there, do I?” Oh, for pete’s sake, I guess not. (I hate to think of the trauma that extra task would have caused her.) So then she’s saying goodbye and starting to hang up and I ask “Is ABC company going to pay for the dishwasher?” WHAT? HUH? You could tell I really surprised her. She said “They are just going to pick it up and install it.” I told her it really had to be paid for. She said “We were just going to pay for it out of the HUD!” Um, NO. I don’t know you, I’m not directly involved with the closing, I know no parties involved…just NO. (I know how HUDS work and I’m sure I would get paid, but not when I’m not involved.) I told her that we weren’t a business—we were just some people selling a dishwasher and we needed payment if someone was going to leave our house with the dishwasher. She was still genuinely taken aback at this thought. She was all stammering about “Well, they were counting on paying for this out of the closing… I guess I can call and see if they have the money…” Um, YES. I told her that would be appreciated.
I can’t wait to see what the next call brings…